The Twisty Switchboard has been swamped with calls from the sorely peckish demanding the recipe for chicken-burgers. Not down with the chicken-burger craze? Both the glaze and the secret sauce can be adapted to any chicken-free grilling situation, such as when you win in a raffle a comely halibut fillet and some plantains (see Fig. 35, above).
1/4 cup soy sauce
2 T orange marmelade
juice of 1/2 orange
2 T canola oil
3 or 4 scallions, quartered
2 or 3 cloves garlic
a Fresno chile, quartered
a pinch of allspice
Whirl all ingredients until liquidy in your Cuisinart Mini-Prep. Reserve in an alternate receptacle, but for the love-a-god don’t clean out the Mini-Prep.
[Note: Mr. T pities the fool who hath no Mini-Prep. Harsh words, I realize, but they’re for your own good. Cusinart’s Ronco-esque claim, “Never touch another knife for the rest of your miserable life!” is goofy (what’s so bad about touching knives?), but the Mini-Prep really does have 1001 uses around the home, boat, or office. It’s the only Cuisinart product worth a damn, I tell you whut]
4 T mayo
2 canned chipotle peppers in adobo sauce
zest and juice from the other half of the orange
Whirl all ingredients in the Mini-Prep with the residual glaze stuff in it. Refrigerate until ready to use.
1 pound ground chicken breast
1 charcoal grill, rack well-oiled, fired up with mesquite
Divide ground chicken into single-serving clumps. Knead a tablespoon of the glaze into each clump and shape into pucks. Grill, basting frequently with glaze. Top with secret sauce, and thank me brokenly.
Under no circumstances put cheese on this chicken-burger!