Monthly Archive: August 2005

Aug 31 2005

Kansas: Marriage Cures Pedophilia

In what was possibly the most precise result in the history of Google, this photo of Macho Man Randy Savage is what the image engine returned when I did a search on "wanker."  Has everybody seen the story about the 20-year-old Nebraska wanker who boinked a 12-year-old, violated a subsequent court order whereupon he knocked …

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Aug 31 2005

St. Louis Cops To Local Rapists: You Go, Girl!

I know, I know; this one’s so gross even I can’t look at it. I hold dual citizenship in Austin and St. Louis, but I confess that, owing to pesky laws of physics precluding my being in two places at once, my monitoring of the latter for patriarchally-motivated crimes against humanity has slacked off in …

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Aug 30 2005

Swaziland, Part 2

Put this in your pipe and smoke it: forty percent of Swazis are HIV positive. Reader Judy sends in this story about the revolutionary method employed by Mswati III, King of Swaziland to prevent the spread of HIV in his realm: a sex ban. This, coming from a dude with twelve wives and a fiancée. …

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Aug 29 2005

My Patriarchy-Blaming Day Is Shaping Up Nicely

Bare-breasted virgins whipped for not turning down the music at a teen-bride-choosing party for the King of Swaziland. Plot of 50′s B movie "Annette and Frankie’s African Adventure"? Nope! [Via reluctant patriarchy-blamer Dan Durchholz] Meanwhile, you know how white male liberals are increasingly revealing their inner misogynist douchebags with astonishing neocon notions like "abortion is …

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Aug 28 2005

Natural History

My hood. County Road 202, Blanco County, Texas Saturday morning. I spring from my bed with a glad cry, effect the disappearance without a trace of several cups of espresso, pack the dogs into my old kit bag, and do hie for El Rancho Deluxe, our rural seat in the heart of the picturesque Texas …

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Aug 27 2005

A Tale Of Two Rapes

On August 24: A man was raped in Johannesburg. A woman was raped in Doncaster. The man was raped by three women. They invited him into their car, went for a drink, then drove to an abandoned field where they produced a gun. The woman was raped the old-fashioned way, overpowered in a dark alley …

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Aug 26 2005

Cultural Revolution II: Misogyny Is The Opiate Of The People

女孩是坏 Is there an orthographer in the house? Could you please explain to me why, when reading Chinese words expressed with the Roman alphabet, one invariably encounters what appears to be deliberate obfuscation? In other words, what’s with all the exoticism, all the Xs and Us? Is it not just gratuitous? I mean, you can …

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Aug 24 2005

Pink

Need a hollow, mirthless laugh? Gendergeek reports on a recent Telegraph article explaining why men account for 96% of music downloads in the UK. The Telegraph’s conclusion? Women would rather go shopping than fiddle with these newfangled computer-thingies. Oh, and the download websites aren’t pastel enough. The Telegraph says tech companies would like nothing better …

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Aug 24 2005

Huevos

mAke hottt l o v e like crazy I see on Feministing that in Mexico a women’s group is trying to get an anti-turtle-egg-eating TV ad banned because its scantily-clad sexbot spokesmodel "promotes women as sexual objects." I can just imagine the torrent of guffaws issuing from the Pussy Marketing Department if anyone were to …

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Aug 23 2005

Fat Chance

Fat Chance contestant Joanne pauses on the catwalk to allow total strangers to appraise her value as a piece of warm fuckable brisket If you are ever in a swimming pool and feel compelled to toss your toddler niece repeatedly up in the air in order to effect the highly gratifying splashdown, and your shoulder …

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