Aug 21 2005

Yogurt Bulletin


What the fashionable North South Austin spinster aunt is breakfasting on.

Laziness and inertia have overtaken me like a gel-headed wanker in a black Corvette. I’ve used my last remaining iota of cogitational vigor to cop this exceedingly plump idea off my BitchPhD co-guest-blogger Elise: the cross-post.

Thanks, Elise!

So soon I’ll be republishing my BitchPhD posts here, for, you know, posterity, and also to prevent the inevitable moment 4 months from now when I start to think maybe I’m going goofy because I can’t find some essay I’m pretty sure I wrote on aborted fetal motherhood a while back. Why bother you with this minutia? So those of you who read Bitch PhD won’t think I’m going goofy when the same boring old posts start showing up on both blogs.

Meanwhile, I have three words for you. Water Buffalo Yogurt. With the consistency of fluffy cream cheese, or marshmallow, it has all of the delicious fat and none of the rubbery sliminess of the cow’s milk version. A triumph of the yogurteur’s art.

Thanks, Central Market!


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  1. Donatella

    Honestly, I can’t figure out if you’re a real feminst or a guy doing a parody of a nutty misandrist feminist. Maybe if I had more time to dig into your posts, I could divine the answer. However, I have better things to do. But as it stands now, for the casual visitor it’s impossible to tell.

  2. Twisty

    Well, so long, sucker!

  3. Emma

    I have one of those Mr. T in your pocket things! I’m just waiting for an odious, bullying telemarketer to call so I can blast “Quit your jibber jabber” down the phone at them.

  4. Emma

    However, I have better things to do.

    Actually, science tells us that very few activities are “better things to do” than reading this blog.

  5. Ron Sullivan

    Yow, synchronicity! We (that’s the Lord of the Pies and me) picked up a coupla those water buffalo yogurts at Andronico’s (that’s the closest supermarket) and, being generally numb till at least the first coffee (that’s just French Roast with a little chicory) we’ve forgotten it till now (that’s at least two weeks in the fridge) and just had it for lunch. So I can give you more good news: it keeps well.

    You’re right, damn, that’s good stuff. Now I’m thinking what else to do with it. I’m thinking maybe adding in some smoked paprika and, hmm, on bread with olives? Little Spanish pickled peppers? Peppers and tomatoes?

  6. TimT

    Despite being labelled a ‘disgruntled fan of the status quo’, I’m also a fan of this blog. Go figure. Guess I’m a masochist.

    Here’s an story from Jordan which might entertain patriarchy blamers and others of that ilk:

    A JORDANIAN woman bit off her husband’s ear after he commented on contestants in a beauty pageant he was watching on television, the official Jordanian news agency Petra said overnight.

    Petra said Om Saleh, from the north-western city of Zarqa “scolded her husband with curses, hit him and finally bit off his ear”.

    The 55-year-old husband had protested about the results of Miss Tourism World 2005 contest and made comments that “angered his wife”.

    “She was not even moved with the sight of blood streaming from her husband’s ear and told one of her sons to take him to the vet to sew it back on,” Petra said.

    Not sure how accurate the story is, though …

  7. res publica

    “A triumph of the yogurteur’s art.”

    I want to be a yougurteur. That is a severely awesome job title. “So, what do you do for a living?” “Me? Oh, I’m a yogurteur.” That would rock.

  8. Donatella

    Throw me a bone heeere, peepel!

    Is this a bona fide feminist site or a parody?

    As in real life with feminists, it’s next to impossible to tell.

  9. Anonymous

    Donatella, I thought you said you had better things to do? By the way- It takes one to know one..if you can’t tell- you aren’t one. And Twisty- DIG on the Mr. T doodad…I was checking it out over the weekend! And here I thought I was the only one who was missing The A Team.

  10. Chris Clarke

    Real Authentic Scary Patriarchy-Blaming Feminists don’t say “bona fide.”

    This is a yoni-fied Feminist site.

  11. ae

    Chris, I’m cheering over here. Brilliant.

    And, Twisty, I’m glad that you’ve decided to x-post, because my browser refuses to load any other page. =)

  12. Sylvanite

    I haven’t noticed any particular misandry here. Of course, the men who visit this blog are civilized folks, rather than pot-stirring trolls. And Twisty is quite hilarious while being serious about the patriarchy-blaming. I don’t understand why anyone would be confused about the nature of this site.

  13. Twisty

    I think this yog will make good tandoori. I also envision involving it in a cucumber bisque.

    Meanwhile, the cappuccino flavor is kicking my ass.

  14. ae

    I’m confused re: Donatella’s confusion re: “real life feminists” and its being “next to impossible to tell” if they’re real or not.


    Anyone who even remotely identifies feminist seems to stick out in a crowd to me. But maybe it’s just me and my “This is what a feminist looks like” t-shirt.

    Clarification, Donatella?

  15. Twisty

    Thanks TimT, for that uplifting exerpt. As you know, most feminists are closeted Klingons.

  16. Tony Patti

    It’s a great back handed compliment, having people confused about whether you are really a feminist because you are funny. And well-rounded and fascinating, too. Just what is a feminist to these people, any way?

    To me a feminist is someone who wishes to raise the consciousness of our patriarchal society by pointing out the simple truths of repression and the nearly ubiquitous examples of male privilege that color our actions in such a culture. Anyone truly pro-women.

    I don’t like those who choose to close the ranks and make it an exclusive club when the ideas need as wide a dissemination as possible in order to take root. Look how well-served socialism in the USA has been by such a competitive and heirarchical attitude…

    I like to think that anyone who thinks they are a feminist has already gotten at least one thing right: That calling yourself a feminist is not exactly a condemnation to beastly life of denial and desperation. It’s a step in the right direction and always to be encouraged, especially among men, even if they are so blind that they make comments that assume their superiority on such things as… JUDGING WHO IS REALLY A FEMINIST AND WHO IS NOT…

    On this blog, a few weeks ago, some woman described just such a man who insisted, if I remember correctly, that a TRUE feminist must go to strip bars and applaud the heartless spectacle of women catering to men’s desires for money. At least the guy thinks he’s a feminist, and will not obstruct some of the more general causes of women. The delusions of men about sexual posturing are deep and tenacious, though. God knows I still catch myself at it constantly.

    It’s nice to try to understand these things, because they improve your general outlook about sex and love when they gain some small foothold in the male consciousness. It’s so hard for men to move past the defensive posture, but once undertaken, it can be so illuminating.

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