Portrait of Jesus by honky godbag/shopping mall painter Thomas Kinkade.
Some readers have suggested that my use of the word “Negro†to describe the ethnicity of ancient Jewish mystic Jesus Christ is racist. I am happy to report that the point is now moot. It has since been explained to me that el Cristo wasn’t an […]
Archive for August, 2005
Negro Problem Solved
Published August 7th, 2005 in Easy Persiflage and Patriarchy-blaming. 23 CommentsMy Unusual Afternoon
Published August 6th, 2005 in Easy Persiflage and Patriarchy-blaming. 73 CommentsMy sister evicting the parasite, young Finn. Note the empyrean glow emanating from Dr. Dude.
Although it is not a requirement, a professional spinster aunt’s street cred is vastly enhanced if she has actual nieces and/or nephews to teach swear words to. I had occasion to ponder this notion yesterday afternoon when my sister surprised me […]
CBS News: Women Two Times More Likely To Experience Death!
Published August 5th, 2005 in Patriarchy-blaming. 11 Comments100% likely to experience death: a little beetle wrapped alive in silk by an unidentified spider. Photographed August 4 2005 by Twisty in North South Austin
Well, I did it. I fell off the news wagon and read an article at CBSNews.com. In terms of sheer vacuity, this undertaking did not disappoint.
The article to which I […]
Tuna salad, Frog style
A little less of this, please:“You are a total idiot. And this is coming from a woman.â€
And a little more of this:“Twisty, you’re brilliant. I would so make out with you.â€
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The Virgin Mary to Wisconsin legislators: "Screw those hoes. Screw’em good."
The current craze for pretending that certain kinds of knowledge do not exist, for the purpose of promulgating antediluvian godbag superstitions about “Baby Jesus†or “Creation†or “The Virgin Mary,†is chapping my hide almost as hard as the current infestation of Austin-based singer-songwriters who […]
Open Letter To The Fucktards Who Take Their Dogs Jogging
Published August 2nd, 2005 in Varmint Center. 24 CommentsI just happenned to have this photo of Bertie…
Hey, asshole! It’s 98 degrees out! The air has the consistency of pudding! Don’t take your dog running when it’s 98 degrees out and the air has the consistency of pudding!
You know dogs can’t perspire, right? You know the only way they get rid of heat is […]
[Today’s essay rapidly outgrew its original incarnation as a response to the many excellent comments on yesterday’s post about the “real†women in the current Dove ad campaign. It doesn’t say anything new, but it’s a marginally better essay. Cuz it’s longer!]
When strolling down the avenue–which avenue, by capitalist mandate, is entirely papered over like […]
Dove Girl Gina displays her intellectual depth with a shake of the old moneymaker. She feels beautiful whenever she poses in her underwear for money.
[I cannot shut up about the Dove ad. Part II of this flap here].
I can be silent no longer!
This Dove-is-so-great crap must cease! Dove is not so great! Dove’s “real†women […]
Click on the bikini!
Thanks a honk-load to everyone who has kindly sent me a link to patriarchy news that requires blaming. Keep’em coming. As you may know, recently I have chosen to withdraw from my addiction to what is sometimes referred to as the Mainstream Media. It is possible that this will merely hone my […]
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