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Sep 13 2005

So Long, Old Friend

At 9:02  this morning, two weeks’ ceaseless bombardment of reportage, both newsular and blogular, on the interwoven subjects of chaos and human suffering and government incompetence and future doom completely overloaded the Twisty obstreperal lobe. It went critical when I read Richard Roeper’s compendium of moron Katrina quotations, and finally blew two minutes later, all over my breakfast of leftover corned beef-on-stale-rye, when perusing assorted disastrously-belated emperor-has-no-clothes realizations coupled with reminders that there’s three-and-a-half more years of this shit.

I do not mourn my brain. It was too large for my neck to support anyway. But the sandwich. I will miss it.

I blame the patriarchy.

9 comments

2 pings

  1. AdamB

    Bush sucks.. and while I did vote for Kerry, it was as a lesser-of-two-evils move. Overall, I’m terribly dissapointed by the ploticians I’ve seen in my life time.

  2. Chris Clarke

    Brain gone? Now you can vote GOP!

  3. norbizness

    You’d better hope you never have to sell the rights to this weblog to Hollywood.

    Aunt Twisty: Dammit, who broke my kitschy plate? (audience ooooh’s)

    Timmy (fat kid with beanie cap): Not me, Aunt Twisty!

    Laurie (little freckled-face sister): Not me, Aunt Twisshhhhhtee (audience awwwww’s)

    Bertie (with voice of Jon Cryer providing internal monologue): Uh-oh, I’d better come clean (audience twitters) (barks adorably)

    Aunt Twisty: Oh, precious Bertie. I could never blame you… (in unison with shouting studio audience) I BLAME THE PATRIACHY!

    (audience cheers and hoots, fade out)

  4. deja pseu

    Twisty, I thought of you this afternoon, here in the bland hell that is LALA Land, as I was following a car with a bumper sticker that said “Keep Austin Weird.”

  5. ae

    I decided after hearing Anderson Cooper say those things to Mary Landrieu that I would never again make fun of him for being an earnest, filler cupcake on CNN. Screw CNN, I never watch it anyway, but that was a real moment of, “Enough w/ the mindf*ck!” We could use another 5,000 years of that from the wholly owned subsidiaries of BechtelMcAOLBurton. Sigh.

    Mmmm, breakfast.

  6. Finn

    The question is, “how many of our heads exploded at the same time?” I’m with ya on the news overload.

    I’m reading Twain’s “Letters From The Earth” to try and regain perspective.

  7. StealthBadger

    I just got revved up again, unhelpful critter that I am… Congressional mid-term elections during a lame-duck presidency are always interesting, but this duck is on 75% disability and applying for more, and the public right now can’t decide whether to spit on the Shrub, Congress, or just sorta aim in the middle and hope for an area effect.

    So if all goes WRONG, I can get depressed later.

    If all goes RIGHT, then in two years the Shrub is out of office. ^^

    I can’t wait!

    *completely admits to being a total freak*

  8. Deanna

    The “Compendium” link doesn’t seem to go where you say it goes – or at least, I see only the front page of a Chicago news site.

  9. Twisty

    Well, as it’s a 2-year-old link, I’m not surprised.

  1. Happy Furry Puppy Story Time with Norbizness

    Way To Piss The Psycho Off, People

    Pwease don’t let the atheists burn my Jesus dowwy! OK, I’m officially adopting the theory that when things are at their blackest, some symbolic controversy related to the Ten Commandments, the Pledge of Allegiance, water stains/potato chips/grilled ch…

  2. Happy Furry Puppy Story Time with Norbizness

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    Pwease don’t let the atheists burn my Jesus dowwy! OK, I’m officially adopting the theory that when things are at their blackest, some symbolic controversy related to the Ten Commandments, the Pledge of Allegiance, water stains/potato chips/grilled ch…

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