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Mar 01 2006

Chimpymail

Here’s an uplifting message from the Drunken Lagomorph.

It’s cute, hey, but when will people learn the difference between a monkey and a chimpanzee holding a pretzel? When?

19 comments

  1. CafeSiren

    That chimp’s a nice antidote to the hollerin’ going on two topics down. I’ve been getting scared of the vitriol, but then I just focus on the enchilada.

  2. ehj2

    firstly, it’s possible, twisty, that you get out just a little too much. it’s simply not plausible that even texas is weird enough that this just all beats its way to your doorstep …

    secondly, genius is a very scary thing …

    /e

    p.s. given secondly, i take back firstly. of course genius beats its way to your door.

  3. Betsy

    Cute. But what’s with these websites that take over your “Back” button so you can’t return to the site you came from?

    That’s not a rhetorical question. I really would like to know their goal. Do they think the viewer will just give in? “Oh, OK, I guess I really did want to stay here and look at this page again and again after all.” ??

    P’archy at fault again, probably. Fascists.

  4. Jodie

    I had a LOT of fun with that chimp.

  5. Violet Socks

    Twisty, here’s something to amuse you: on another blog, a deluded right-wing godbag just compared two gay guys she saw kissing at Disneyworld to the 9-11 hijackers. Yes. Here’s the actual verbatim quote:

    The terrorists crashed into our buildings killing thousands of innocent people. Affecting lives forever. Those gay morons in the Park were intruding upon thousands of young lives, pushing their unacceptable ways on a society geared to the family -knowing and intentionally doing that. Just as the terrorists knowingly and intentionally pushed their views on American on 9/11.

  6. thebewilderness

    Thank you Twisty. Hoot, hoot, hoot.

  7. MzNicky

    Is that Laura Bush?
    :-)

  8. Hattie

    Folkass on the family.

  9. anne

    Thank you, Twisty, for closing the thread beneath the innocent enchilada. Shudder.

  10. Liz

    I wonder where she got her glasses. They’re fabulous. I’ve always wanted some like that.

  11. Twisty

    “Thank you, Twisty, for closing the thread beneath the innocent enchilada. Shudder”

    I was going to wait until the comments reached 200, but my nerves failed. Let us not speak of it again.

  12. kathy a

    “let us not speak of it again” — bless you! may your enchiladas always be generously festooned with cheese. may you never again get the bad table. may bert the wonder-pup grace each day with sloppy kisses and canine entertainment!

  13. whyme63

    Well, I’ve known the difference between a monkey and a chimp since I was 12. Which is when I read “No, He’s Not A Monkey, He’s An Ape and He’s My Son”, by Hester Mundis.

  14. kate

    An excerpt of the excerpt that Violet found posted on a blog:

    “…intruding upon thousands of young lives, pushing their unacceptable ways on a society geared to the family -knowing and intentionally doing that. Just as the terrorists knowingly and intentionally pushed their views on American on 9/11.”

    Let’s re-examine shall we?

    “intruding upon…
    young lives
    pushing
    their unacceptable ways
    knowingly and intentionally
    doing that
    knowingly and intentionally
    pushing their
    views”

    All that pushing upon. Methinks the writer wants to do some pushing of their own and are holding by every thread to overcome that overwhelming inner force that pushes so intentionally.

  15. Kate

    Oh and I love the chimp mail. Now I have found a way to communicate with my slothly son who sleeps all day, works at night and forgets his duties per living under my roof.

  16. ehj2

    kate,

    personally, i’ve always preferred “knowingly and unintentionally” … sort of the same way i abhor “new and improved” when i can get “new and unimproved” or “old and improved.”

    i’ve occasionally found myself wondering how something that didn’t exist before, and is therefore “new,” could also be “improved.”

    i’m just silly that way. knowingly and perhaps even intentionally. well, at least consciously. whatever.

    /ehj2

  17. Violet Socks

    Knowingly and intentionally pushing a new and improved pushiness.

    I’m glad someone else enjoyed it; I thought it was freaking hilarious. Two guys kissing = 9/11. The mind reels.

  18. ehj2

    well, you see, rhetorically speaking, and metaphorically and all, on the continuum of space-time disasters, the two guys kissing and 9/11 equivalence pushes us inexorably to the obvious conclusion of the quantum equivalence of gay marriage and multiple tactical nuclear strikes in the top ten most-dense industrial cities. don’t you see that?

    evolution is just a silly theory. but these are real verifiable inarguable endlessly-substantiated mathematically-based facts.

    it’s fifth column stuff. maybe even sixth column. it’s even worse than terrorism because it’s so subtle only those who’ve rammed a pencil through their prefontal lobes and stirred vigorously can truly comprehend it.

    i mean, do that and you’ll see exactly what i mean.

    /ehj2

  19. Betsy

    Space being (don’t forget to remember) Curved
    (and that reminds me who said o yes Frost
    Something there is which isn’t fond of walls)

    an electromagnetic (now Ive lost
    the) Einstein expanded Newton’s law preserved
    conTinuum (but we read that beFore)

    of Course life being just a Reflex you
    know since Everything is Relative or

    to sum it All Up god being Dead (not to

    mention inTerred
    LONG LIVE that Upwardlooking
    Serene Illustrious and Beatific
    Lord of Creation, MAN:
    at a least crooking
    of Whose compassionate digit, earth’s most terrific

    quadruped swoons into billiardBalls!

    - e e cummings

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