Speaking of women’s bodily sovereignty, have you all seen this morning’s breathless communiqué from Planned Parenthood? Apparently misogynist anti-choice fucktards are luring unsuspecting women into fake PP clinics and opening cans of past-date whupass on’em. I present the whole email; the PP blog featuring the story is inconvenient to navigate.
An Indiana mother recently accompanied her daughter and her daughter’s boyfriend to one of Indiana’s Planned Parenthood clinics, but they unwittingly walked into a “crisis pregnancy center” run by an anti-abortion group — one that shared a parking lot with the real Planned Parenthood clinic, and was designed expressly to lure Planned Parenthood patients and deceive them.
The group took down the girl’s confidential personal information and told her to come back for her appointment, which they said would be in their “other office” (the real Planned Parenthood office nearby). When she arrived for her appointment, not only did the Planned Parenthood staff have no record of her, but the police were there — the “crisis pregnancy center” had called them, claiming that a minor was being forced to have an abortion against her will.
The “crisis pregnancy center” staff then proceeded to wage a campaign of intimidation and harassment over the following days, showing up at the girl’s home and calling her father’s workplace. Our clinic director reports that she was “scared to death to leave her house.” They even went to her school and urged classmates to pressure her not to have an abortion.
Behind the Story: The anti-choice movement is setting up so-called “crisis pregnancy centers” across the country. Some of them have neutral-sounding names and run ads that falsely promise the full range of reproductive health services, but dispense anti-choice propaganda and intimidation instead. And according to The New York Times, there are currently more of these centers in the U.S. than there are actual abortion providers! What’s more, these centers have received $60 million of government grants. They’re being funded by our tax dollars.
It seems extraordinary that nobody in the real Planned Parenthood clinic perceived that a fake Planned Parenthood clinic had sprung up next door. Clearly the organization is in dire need of donations so they can afford to staff their clinics with non-morons.
Planned Parenthood Staffer X: I’m goin’ out for coffee. Anyone want anything?
Planned Parenthood Staffer Y: You goin’ to Starbucks?
Planned Parenthood Staffer X: Naw, I thought I’d try that new joint that just opened next door to the place with the big sign that says “Planned Parenthood Crisis Clinic.”
Planned Parenthood Staffer Y: You mean the place within a stone’s throw of our genuine clinic?
Planned Parenthood Staffer X: Yeah, it’s right across the parking lot from here. See where all the pregnant women and girls are getting sucked through that doorway as though there were an evil godbag vortex inside? It’s next door to that.
Planned Parenthood Staffer Y: I’ll take a double Americano.