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Apr 30 2006

Dude Week: The Gripping Series Finale

Just a few final remarks on the Male Feminist chimera, after which I’ll swill my own hot cup of Shut The Fuck Up.

[Just joining us? The plot so far: In series of increasingly asinine comments on recent post, 20-something porn-loving white dude claims feminist cred. Smackdown ensues. White dude issues apology here; readers divided on whether to forgive and forget. Meanwhile, author posits that, re: male involvement in women's liberation from male oppression, dudes can support cause all they like as long as they stay fuck out of way.]

One of my points was that it’s easy for men to “support” feminist causes, since ultimately it’s not their ass on the line. Apparently I was sorely mistaken on this. One commenter, who identifies as a “male ally,” wrote that he wouldn’t mind a little “recognition”—of what sort and from whom I cannot fathom—for his pro-feminist habit of sauntering around town sticking up for women whenever he encounters guys engaging in “misogynist bullshit.” He contends that his ass is indeed on the line, because the thankless practice of suggesting to men that women are human actually puts him at risk for physical assault (unfortunately, he did not enlighten the group as to the precise nature of his pro-feminist sojourns—does he tag misogynist billboards under cover of darkness? Does he chuck Molotov cocktails into strip clubs? Does he inform Kyle, his cubicle-mate, that it’s rude to leave Xeroxes of his ass on Stacy’s desk, and then run for his life?—or whether any such assaults had ever actually occurred).

I feel this dude’s hypothetical pain, though, because what a coincidence! Physical assault is precisely what I found myself at risk for just last night! I was engaged in the super-sexy provocative take-me-now act of waiting at a long, deserted stoplight alone in my convertible, listening to AC Newman and minding my own fucking business. In the next lane rolled up a Ford F-150 ClodCab full of shirtless white fucks yelling through a cloud of reefer, “Nice car, baby! Take me for a ride!” It’s times like those when I am pleased that the Twistmobile is fleet of rubber, and that on abandoned straightaways at midnight can hit 70 MPH before red-lining in 2nd gear while I flip the bird at rapidly receding truckfuls of asswipes.

But I digress.

Possible bodily injury gone unrecognized by ungrateful feminists may indeed be vexing this guy, but if it is, he’s not letting on. Jeff Passan, the guy in question, is a sports writer who demonstrates the principle of Speaking Out Against Honky Male Oppression While Not (as far as I know) Demanding To Get His Ass Kissed For It. His article illuminates the rampant misogyny in major league baseball with a brief profile of Kim Ng, sexism-plagued female assistant general manager for the Dodgers. One of the highlights is his description of professional knob Keith Hernandez’s professional knobbery:

When New York Mets broadcaster Keith Hernandez saw San Diego Padres massage therapist Kelly Calabrese in the dugout, referred to her as a ‘girl,’ asked ‘What’s going on here?’ and followed with ‘You have to be kidding me,’ only to top himself with this doozy:

‘I won’t say that women belong in the kitchen, but they don’t belong in the dugout.’

I won’t say that pigs belong in the pen, but they don’t belong in the broadcast booth.

Passan goes on to summarize the reason this spinster aunt would rather have root canal than sit through a major league sporting event of any kind:

“Of course, that someone in baseball disparaged women was more a matter-of-time issue than an isolated incident. The baseball environment rewards male empowerment and breeds sexism. It’s a Petri dish for testosterone.”

Mercifully, Passan’s knight in shining armor rhetoric doesn’t quite rise to the level of that Kristof guy from the New York Times who emotes on behalf of Pakistani rape victim-turned-activist-turned-political-prisoner Mukhtaran Bibi. He merely quotes Ng as admitting she’s resigned to the debilitating sexism she encounters in her professional life, and comments, “Baseball should be embarrassed that one of its bright young minds must weather such ignorance by internalizing it.”

That’s all it takes, dudes. Say it, don’t spray it.

[Gracias, Kate]

55 comments

2 pings

  1. Pony

    Passan link?

  2. Sara

    Nice, Twisty.

    And you know what the most beautiful part of all this is for me? I’ll tell you:

    I have no idea whether Jeff Passan looks at pornography or not. I don’t know if he’s married. I don’t know his stance on BDSM. I just know that he has at least once openly disparaged the widespread practice of treating women like shit.

    Really, quite delightful. Thank you.

  3. Pony

    Now I get the link.

    Fine, yes; but I’m not giving Passan any credit. None. I’m through thanking men for being human.

    But I am thanking you for the inclusion of your cartoons to the blog.

  4. Hattie

    You are moving into creative high gear. Great stuff.

  5. Ms Kate

    Thanks for reading and posting that link to share – with an excellent analysis to boot. (I’m the one who sent it, btw)

    I was pretty stunned, both by what Ng puts up with and by the way Passan calls it out. He tells the story without any need to call for her to be rescued or protected by “better”, more progressive men. No overt “made her bed now lie in it” bullshit either. Telling it like it is only preserves Ng’s dignity – she doesn’t come off as a victim, but as a pioneer.

    Bearing witness. That’s what it is called. That’s what is needed from our allies. That is what will help us move ahead.

  6. Hogan

    Could we have next year’s Dude Week during Women’s History Month? ‘Cause, you know, you already get a whole month.

  7. thebewilderness

    May we have permission to upload your artwork to the Tshirt site for reproduction purposes? I’m not a Tshirt kind of guy, but for IBTP and ‘the shrill one’ I feel the need to make exceptions. Thanks, Rose

  8. Ron Sullivan

    Jeez, Hogan, if I were an African-American women I’d get two whole months! Wow, man, Rulers of the Universe!

    I can’t tell if it’s the hangover from wine, whiskey, and antihistamines plus unaccustomed kinds and amounts of physical labor or my native cynicism that persuades me that it’s neccessary to stipulate that I’m being sarcastic there.

  9. Ron Sullivan

    Woman. Woman singular. Well, I said I was hung over. Now I’m sneezing too. I Blame the Patriarchy.*

    *for planting my street with “fruitless” mulberries, which are male clones, and which pollinate like mad every spring. Trees that bear fruit are “too messy” for urban plantings, ya see.

  10. Pony

    Ron

    Here they import little wisps of trees from PITTSBURGH to line our streets, tied to beanpoles bigger than they are to stabalize them. Why? Well because PITTSBURGH is apparently one of the most polluted cities in the western hemosphere, and if they can lilve there choking on pollution they’ll live anywhere. Pah. To accommodate the stupid sticklings they chop down 100 year old Great Plains Poplar and Tamarack.

  11. AoT

    So, first you say men don’t have their ass on the line, and I say that some of us do put our ass on the line. That was my only point. Not that I am at the same risk as you are, nor that I deserve an award.

    Bah, I suppose I’ll just remain quiet from now on.

  12. thebewilderness

    AoT,

    Well AoT, you know what they say, it’s not so much what you say as the way you say it.

  13. AoT

    True that.

  14. Hogan

    I can’t tell if it’s the hangover from wine, whiskey, and antihistamines plus unaccustomed kinds and amounts of physical labor or my native cynicism that persuades me that it’s neccessary to stipulate that I’m being sarcastic there.

    OK, this has gone far enough. Dudes–out of the pool. The blamers need their space back.

  15. Metal Prophet

    Or, in short: doing a modestly virtuous thing shouldn’t require applause.

  16. Burrow Klown

    here here MP.

  17. Edith

    I love the cartoons. If they were on mugs, they would way outsell Far Side. Something to think about, if you’re into capitalism.

    Also, I don’t know if I’d call this a “dude” week per se, because despite one or two dudely dudes, this has been a week of many great gems courtesy of dudettes and not so dudely dudes. It was like someone came to this site, all sincere, personifying everything you like to mock. And then asked, all sincere, please, don’t mock me! Take me seriously!

    Whoever said it’s like selling dolphin safe tuna to tuna, yeah, it’s about that level of hilarity for me. By which I mean to say, totally hilarious. Then again, we live in a society where talking M&M’s tell us to eat them, so I guess I could see the confusion over what, exactly, is so humorous.

    Oh yeah, and anything a man suffers from defending women is nothing compared to what a woman gets from being a woman. It is not worth our time to be sympathetic or all nice and shit about giving up your all-season ticket to ignoring women’s oppression for thirty seconds a day or week or year. How big of you, advocating on behalf of a group of people to which you don’t belong! As they say where I’m from: barf me out, and gag me with an American Express Black credit card.

  18. Kaka Mak

    The cartoon rocks very hard. FreeMonster got me to pull my head out of my perviously simpering, apologetic ass for a few posts — I’ll give him a wee prop for that.

    Do you wear a cowgal hat, Twisty? Cuz I’m trying to pull off that look without looking like I’m “trying to pull off that look.” I got the horses …

  19. Kaka Mak

    Ah, that’s “previously.” Perv-iously. Perv-like. Snort.

  20. al

    Ok, so this really belongs in the first post, but I loved Ron’s rant re. MFs. I’ve been called apathetic by a guy who insisted he was a “real” feminist (read “leftist dude who buys hos, but pounds ass ‘respectfully’”), and her list was effin’ brilliant! Just what I needed.

    On the plus side, I know a guy who probably could be considered a male feminist (if such a chimera exists). He’s anti-capitalist, anti-pornstitution, anti-dickheads. But the boy’s in denial: He swears he only reads I Blame The Patriarchy for the recipes!

  21. Pony

    Hot Beet Borscht

    1 lb boneless stewing beef, cut in 1 inch cubes
    1 lb short ribs
    4 large beets, scrubbed and unpeeled, with about 1 inch tops intact
    2 medium onions, finely chopped
    4 medium potatoes, quartered
    2, 28 oz tins canned Roma tomatoes
    salt and pepper
    1/2 cup brown sugar
    4 Tbsp lemon juice

    Place the meat, beets, onions, potatoes and tomatoes in a Dutch oven with enough water to cover. Bring to a boil. Turn down heat and simmer, uncovered, for 2 to 3 hours, or until the meat and vegetables are tender. Add canned tomatoes last hour or so.

    Remove the beets. Rinse under cold water and remove the skins. Slice and return to the soup. Add salt and pepper.

    Add brown sugar, then lemon juice to taste, adjusting quantities for the balance you like.

    Serves 8.

    From Across the Table
    An Indulgent Look at Food in Canada

    By Cynthia Wine
    Original Watercolours Mary Pratt

  22. kathy a

    excellent cartoons!

    doesn’t this post need a sub-caption? something like, “in which our hero rides bravely into the sunset, continuing his determined search for shangri-la and dolphin-safe tuna.” [i'm sure someone else can do much better.]

  23. Ron Sullivan

    AoT, I’m thinking that the best thing would be for you guys to pat each other on the back, and look to each other for backpats. You could also tell your female friends and acquaintances how you think and what you do, not so much for praise as to let them know they have allies close by.

  24. norbizness

    “And then we’ll solve the mystery of what happened to the furniture when we were at Curra’s, Wonder Dog!”

    Edith: is The Dude a dudely dude or a non-dudely dude?

    As for male feminists seeking recognition, might I suggest a sandwich sign? They were huge in the Depression!

  25. antelope

    Well heck, I’m feeling gracious tonight, so hey, thanks AoT. Really.

    As one of the people who said that what guys should do is talk to other guys it did in fact cross my mind that there’s some physical risk in that.

    What I was getting at, in my lazy, unfinished way, is that maybe the dudes who think that a good way to be a feminist is by telling women what they should or shouldn’t say are doing so precisely because it’s a much more appealing form of self-righteousness – one with a much lower chance of getting your ass kicked.

    This in turn makes me think that women need to kick more asses, if that’s the only language that certain guys are able to comprehend as a way of saying, “I care about my dignity and I will not be condescended to by the likes of you.” Guys can sometimes persuade other guys just by talking, but maybe part of that is because, being a guy, it is already taken for granted that he could kick some ass, if he wanted to. Maybe women need to do a bit more to make it clear that we choose not to kick ass because it’s a really stupid hobby, rather than letting “people” (i.e. male asshats) think that some physical or moral failing holds us back.

    Furthermore, I think that if any woman should instinctively elbow a guy in the throat as a response to breast-groping, or knee him in the balls as a response to sexist comments – it is every bit as much a crime of passion as the shit men do when they catch “their” woman in bed with someone else, and the courts should make it perfectly clear that men cannot expect to be protected from these kinds of responses. Not even when they result in asphyxiation or infertility because, after all, she couldn’t think clearly at the moment (and for anybody who doesn’t already know this, you can’t, so we just need to develop killer instincts in lieu of thinking).

    Anyway – returning from fantasyland. Based on what little I know about you AoT, I say rock on. And see if you can get some of your male friends to start calling other dudes on their bullshit while you’re at it – increasing your numbers to where they just wouldn’t bother to say those things in the first place is your best protection.

    And hey, if there were any other dudes out there I forgot to validate, consider yourself validated by an official female feminist. Hell, you can even tell yourselves that you’ve been validated by a really hot female feminist if you feel the need to believe that. Or a hairy-legged, braless feminist, whatever floats your boat. Now go out there & change the men for us, okay?

    We’ll stay here and mind the hearth.

  26. scratchy888

    http://eatmyheart.blogspot.com

  27. cypress

    from Pony in # 21

    Original Watercolours Mary Pratt

    have you ever looked at Mary Pratt’s paintings? she’s a canadian treasure for sure. here’s a link .

    be well

  28. cypress

    oh dear. i’ve shown myself to be slightly amateur in the html tag department. and also in the use of the pronoun ‘you’ – which was a general question to all y’ all, not a call out to Pony, to whom i give thanks for the recipe and the mary pratt reminder.

  29. Ron Sullivan

    …PITTSBURGH is apparently one of the most polluted cities in the western hemosphere…

    Heh. Not lately it isn’t. Well, not the way it used to be, since everything but retail is being outsourced in the US.

    What your town is apparently doing vis-a-vis trees if obscene in more directions than I care to go on abou this late when I have to get up early tomorrow. Feh.

  30. The Fat Lady Sings

    Well jeeze – I fall down, break my leg and disappear for a few weeks and look what happens! I miss out on some helaciously good banter and cool anti-patriarchal exchanges! Shit!!! Well – everybody seemed in fine fettle. MF certainly had what life is about for those of us with complimentary chromosomes explained in three-part harmony. Cool beans, everyone. I wish I had something pithy to add; but I don’t – so let me just say I love the artwork, and I’m glad you seem to be feeling up to snuff, Twisty. I know the subject of why we all come here has already been covered with great specificity; but I wanted to add my two centavos on that subject. I come for Twisty, first and foremost. I mean – it’s also a real pleasure to read everyone else’s thoughts on any given subject (I really like the crowd) – but I truly enjoy your point of view, Twisty. You lift my day – even when you’re PO’d over something – you’re a delight to read. So MF? Next time go over some of the archives and steep yourself in full-on Twisty lore. It’ll save all of us a heck of a lot of time (though I must admit the getting there was one hell of a lot of fun)!

  31. Edith

    norbizness, The Dude is the dudeliest dude of the dudes, although he might think he’s a non-dudely dude. But that’s just because dudes aren’t really the best judge of their dudeliness anyway. Dudettes are.

  32. ae

    Twisty, these are so cleverly drawn. I love Bert’s raised ear. Ha. And mmm, tacos.

    I’m back to my earlier jawboning about this question, utopian though it may be. If we teach the kiddies from Day 1 that everyone controls their own body, is entitled to their talents (and the expression thereof), and has dignity, maybe we can break down the dom-sub paradigm and forego this whole ‘thanks for being human’ conundrum in the future? No need for specific thanks if everyone’s behaving humanely as a matter of course. It’s a sad comment on our dangerous world when men who respond w/ general compassion/respect/integrity are so out of the norm that thanks are due (or so it can be argued).

    As a general rule, I think this falls under, “Here’s a cookie.” That said, it ain’t easy being a rabblerouser, no matter how comparatively small the rabble you’re rousing, so thanks, AoT. As Dear Leader notes, it’s hard work. The status quo has a powerful pull; any action against it necessitates sacrifice to some degree. Most of us are still quite protected though, so we shouldn’t break our arms patting ourselves on the back.

  33. Erin

    Hey, Ron, thanks for defending my hometown. Pony, since the mills closed in the early ’80s, Pittsburgh produces mostly ketchup and doctors, neither one of which seems to bother the trees much.

  34. Pony

    No slur against your hometown Erin. Just the way things are done, generally. The boulevard trees were bred in Pittsburgh, where they were hybridized to specially withstand automobile exhaust. They aren’t the only ones here though. Lots of imported American Elm plagued with Dutch Elm disease. Still, the indigenous trees, like the indigenous people, fight the environment, the pollution and the prejudice, that something from somewhere else is better, to survive.

  35. Pony

    Cypress I love Mary Pratt’s work. It is so–dare I say it–womanly. The cookbook I referenced is filled with it. Thanks for the link. If I ever get to Toronto I’ll be sure to visit that gallery. Another artist I love is, of course, Emily Carr. Her work I have seen. Simply stunning.

  36. FamousSovietAthlete

    “And then we’ll solve the mystery of what happened to the furniture when we were at Curra’s, Wonder Dog!”

    And the windows!

  37. Ms Kate

    It is easy for guys to pat themselves on the back or seek appreciation for feminism in feminist spaces. It is vastly more effective to publish scathing, blunt accounts of outrageous sexism (by men and women)in far less progressive spaces that speak to the simple justice issues involved.

    The Kim Ng baseball article wasn’t in Ms. magazine, it was on Yahoo Sports and was being discussed in overwhemingly male chat spaces in terms of the injustices involved. That’s where my husband picked it up. In the same way that many of us married straights say “because it just isn’t FAIR!” when prohibitions on gay marriage come up, men were taking other men to task over “well, that’s what she gets for wanting that (male) job” bullshit, or expressing sincere regrets that their hobby/sport of choice could be far more backward than even their own workplaces. That is progress on a front we can’t get to alone.

    Men will never and can never fully understand what it is like to be a woman. But all of us can be allies of “the others” if we firmly insist on the larger values of decency and fairness for all. That’s the essence of justice.

  38. Hogan

    As for male feminists seeking recognition, might I suggest a sandwich sign? They were huge in the Depression!

    WILL BLAME FOR COOKIES

  39. Ron O

    Pony – Thanks for the Borscht recipe. That one has more meat than most I’ve had.

    Doesn’t all borscht contain beets? Why call it beet borscht?

  40. Pony

    I don’t think the word means beets. You can have cabbage borscht for example. And yes the recipe above has a LOT of meat. It’s definitely a winter borscht. I would half the amount of meat. I have dozens of borscht/borsch/borsht recipes. One very nice one is vegetarian and strained then served cold with a smetana (sour cream). Originally borscht is soured with kvass rather than lemon or vinegar.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kvass

  41. Dubhe

    Wow!

    A man who, occasionally, after gauging the situation from afar to determine whether or not the situation is one he could handle should it turn ugly, puts his physical well-being nominally at risk, if he feels like it!

    As opposed to the woman he’s so chivalrously helping, who is in a much greater degree of physical risk, whether she wants to be or not, without any ability to size up the situation beforehand, ALL THE TIME.

    Tell me who deserves the cookie, again?

  42. Pony

    One of the ways men who have reached a workable level of feminism can make a difference is to volunteer coaching girls in sports, and helping to organizing maths and science fairs for girls.

    {Beyond writing a cheque which I think is mandatory because really he’s getting the money some woman who’s working for minimum wage to shore up his position should have been paid.}

    With the former, a tip: Do not do what the soccer coach of a little girl I know did. After pleading with Coach to allow her daughter to play and listening to the coach adamantly say why she had every right to play and he definitely would encourage little girls to play, the mother and all the players heard him roar at a little boy whom he pulled off the field mid-game:

    “If you play like a girl I’m going to treat you like a girl.”

  43. Ron O

    OMG I’ve learned something from a woman, somebody give me a sugar beet. ;)

    I’ve only had a type of Polish borscht which is a thin beet broth served warm with a little meat filled pastry floating in it. So good! Now I want some. I’m gonna check out a Polish restaurant near work I’ve been meaning to try and see if they have any. My sister hosted family party yesterday and served several types of Pierogi, sausage, beet salad, and sauerkraut. One more meal should fix the Polish cravings for while.

  44. Mandos

    Dare I say, it should polish them off?

  45. Ron O

    One other thing. I’m a runner and volunteer for Girls on the Run (http://www.girlsontherun.org/). They do not allow men to coach, which I orginally wanted to do. After learning more about the organization, that policy made sense to me. I ended up helping out with special events and fundraising stuff. My brother-in-law coaches his daughter’s basketball team, so there are possibilities if I ever have a daughter. If I end up coaching boys, I think I can do some good too, unlike the guy you mentioned.

  46. teffie-phd

    Twisty said: “It’s times like those when I am pleased that the Twistmobile is fleet of rubber, and that on abandoned straightaways at midnight can hit 70 MPH before red-lining in 2nd gear while I flip the bird at rapidly receding truckfuls of asswipes.”

    I want to be at the next stoplight where that happens just to watch them eat your dust. (And I’ll use my knitting needles to puncture their tires).

  47. cypress

    Pony #35 – i have the good fortune to live in emily carr land – and today the cedar trees in the garden are dancing.

    Virtual Museum of Canada has images and info. it’s a place to begin. Carr’s work is not well known – and if she had been better known she’d be part of what came to be called ‘the group of 7′.

    we all know who to blame for her not being recognized, compensated or respected.

  48. Pony

    Ron O.

    Just get out there with that attitude and spread it around. Teach the boys and the girls (wow you’d be amazed how many girls now can’t cook!) how to make soup. Very easy with a slow cooker.

    Cypress I envy you so much. I spent several happy hours along the coast up from Victoria and then at that little Emily Carr gallery, about 14 years ago.

    Mandos if it hurts to say *polish* then eat pyrogha which is the Ukrainian word for pierogies. Purr roh heh

  49. Ron O

    I’m happy to report the borscht met my expectations. They had a Lithuanian style which still had the thin warm beet broth, but with little dumplings instead of a meat pastry. Three side salads (cold sauerkraut, warm beets, and a red cabbage) were all tasty. The stuffed cabbage wasn’t as good as grandpa’s; the gravy could have had some mushrooms. Overall a winner, I’ll go back.

    The place was filled with Poles. I got a chuckle from the patrons with my horrible pronunciation. Thankfully the waitress spoke english well.

  50. W.Shore

    Twisty, if you like AC Newman I must recommend AC’s first band, back from when he was just Carl Newman. They’re called Zumpano and their first album rawks. If you can’t find it, I would happily send you a copy.

  51. TP

    The male feminist can only listen and learn. Many men call themselves feminists and they never listen to anything unless it is to more vigorously defend their self righteous feminist dudeliness.

    A male feminist will always make key mistakes because of his own deeply ingrained assumptions about male privilege. Many men call themselves feminists and then spend endless amounts of time pretending that sexist crap they say was really helpful advice.

    The male feminist will always be a feminist whether you consider him one or not. Many men will give lip service to the feminist label if they see it as cool or what all their female friends are doing, but some men are simply born predisposed to listen when women teach them the strange and terrible truths about what it really feels like to be a member of the sex class in a world that grows increasingly hysterical about higher and more transgressive levels of X-Treme Sexiness each day.

    A male feminist will always indicate a more enlightened and open minded attitude about the sexes than an openly sexist man. So that even the most pathetic and jeer-worthy idiot out there briefly trying on the sensational clothing of feminist garb is better than the huge majority of men who actively seek to humiliate and subdue women in as many ways as they can devise. Like certain Dakotan Governors.

    The male feminist is just a marginal event in the really important struggle to raise the consciousness of women. Sure, feminist men would like to think that they are so noble and patronizing and that the women are so fucking lucky to have men like them on their side and on and on until you want to vomit. But the fact is simple and unarguable: Women need to understand first, women need to share and lean and grow, women are the ones who are taught to submit and accept it. Saving one woman from mistrusting feminism is far more important than any number of men. The men already have it made! Who could possibly care about them?

  52. Ms Kate

    And we all know that women have the vote because the consciousness of women was raised.

    And the civil rights gains of the 50s and 60s were only because people of color were enlightened.

    Right.

    Perhaps raising and enlightening women to refuse to cooperate comes first, but that is only part of the picture IMHO. There is ultimately a need to finish the job from the other side: to co-opt and corrupt the powers that the patriarchy holds over our lives by undermining the privelege in the name of fairness. That involves male allies to stand for justice and do some inside work that we are not able to do.

  53. Pony

    Ms. Kate

    That theory is only slightly more appealing than the one I read on Broadsheet not long ago, apropos the birth-control pill; which, did you know? ushered in women’s liberation.

    Someone named DAN.

  54. scratchy888

    Wow!

    A man who, occasionally, after gauging the situation from afar to determine whether or not the situation is one he could handle should it turn ugly, puts his physical well-being nominally at risk, if he feels like it!

    As opposed to the woman he’s so chivalrously helping, who is in a much greater degree of physical risk, whether she wants to be or not, without any ability to size up the situation beforehand, ALL THE TIME.

    Tell me who deserves the cookie, again?

    I’ve said it before — and it bears repeating: Right wing males like to represent themselves as being “tough”. This toughness, unfortunately, stays at a level of self-representation, often not approaching actuality — especially in relation to how tough the women in a right wing societyactually need to be, just to survive.

  55. big momma

    i have a friend, a term used sparingly more and more, who is of white male descent. he is a African American studies major to boot. he always professes his “feminism” and when i was sending him links to anti-porn blogs by one of his heroes, Stan Goff, he told me i was “preaching to the choir” but he is a single male and needs to go see strippers. A few weeks ago he said he called a woman who gave him his number, had sex with her and later told me she was a whore cause she let him “put it in her butt”. we went came back from a trip egypt, where my breast was grabbed by a young local and later a shop keeper attemted to dry hump me, i told people about it. it was my way of dealing with my own personal anger of not being able to do anything and not having done anything when i could of (like knock the shop keepers ass out). my “friend” told me it offended him that i told people about it firs and made him feel like i did not appreciate the trip (since he paid for it with Army money from being in iraq).

    there is nothing like being invalidated and told to sit down and shut up.

    his mom even got in on it and told him she has had worse stuff happen to her in the US, so what am i complaining about.

    could this be the fault of………. patriarchy?……….(oh no!)

  1. Feminist Law Professors » Blog Archive » Hooray Kelly Calabrese!

    [...] Update Two: See also “Baseball’s other barrier,” via I Blame the Patriarchy. [...]

  2. F-Words

    Credit where credit’s due

    Unless feminists are committed to keeping the world a shitty place until we can slip seamlessly into a morally-unambiguous, universally-appreciated utopia, I think it would be wise to welcome Freeman into the fold.

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