Motherland swirling down the crapper? Just pimp out your women.
Mad Vlad Putin, facing a debilitating population shortfall, wants to pay Russian women to produce human meat on the hoof. Nine thousand bucks per live foal, plus an extra bucket of oats each month. Gosh, was there ever a social crisis that couldn’t be solved by governmental commandeering of women’s uteruses?
The NY Times observes that, because the Russian citizenry stands out among world populations as just one big mass of bodily decay, the dough might be better spent keeping current Russians alive. But patriarchies can’t stand humanitarian solutions—not enough dominance involved. Far better to encourage women to sell themselves. The idea has such a homely, comforting familiarity.
Putin’s nationalist broodmare plan is nuts not just in terms of women’s oppression, but because it won’t even work. Replacing the hundreds of thousands expected to die off in the near future from HIV, tuberculosis, cancer, violence, and assorted other nasty afflictions would, according to the Times, require “feats of fertility unseen in the industrialized world.” Not to mention the insanity, given the unsustainability of the world’s current population, of encouraging higher birthrates among Russians or anybody else.
While I’m at it, I must also wrinkle the Twisty lip over the stupid headline of the aforelinked piece: “Russians, Busy Making Shrouds, Are Asked to Make Babies.” Busy making shrouds? What is this, 1917? Are we on the set of Dr. Zhivago? If anyone even still uses shrouds, it’s a cert they’re made in China.