May 29 2006

Lean Cuisine

Chick food
If only I were a caption-blogger.

You know those beer commercials that appeal to hairy-knuckled 18-to-34-year-old morons with the jolly idea that guys own whatever they penetrate? This Flux dude believes that I (along with fellow-blamer Hedonistic) “overreacted” to these “fairly innocent and clever” ads when I posted a couple of paragraphs about them a few weeks ago. Apparently my having satirized Boo-Yah Nation with a bunch of totally made-up shit about an obscure French historical figure with a finger stuck in a beer bottle amounts to an egregiously wasteful intellectual expenditure.

(Words cannot express the gratitude that washes over me when male persons express concern for the potential depletion of my mental reserves whenever I cast uncalled-for aspersions on “minor foolishness” like misogyny. Indeed, after having completed the arduous yet ultimately silly task of composing the aforementioned 150-word inflammatory lampoon, I had to lie down and stare blankly at the ceiling for two hours. Next time I’ll try to remember to laugh along with the funny sexist comedy-joke instead of getting so riled up I resort to inventing French history just for the hell of it. Think of the brainpower I’ll save! Maybe I can use it to clean toilets.)

Flux further speculates that I am “out of [my] mind,” intimates that because he has seen beer commercials that were even more sexist I shouldn’t be writing about this one, and declares that it is precisely my sort of irrational crap that gives the Rush Limbaughs of the world “grist for their ‘feminazi’ mills.”

Rather than risk further diminution of my loony Rush-baiting girl-brain, I’ll refrain from making fun of that tired old metaphor.

I hate to imagine what old Flux, regulator of female thought processes that he is, would say about the following hilarious excerpt from an indictment of the misogyno-homophobic Man-Eat-Meat Burger King commercials vs. patriarchy-approved Lean Cuisine ads. Nothing, probably, since it was written by a guy.

Contrary to Burger King’s celebration of men being revered for shoveling food into their mouths, Lean Cuisine molds women as such: a group of woman brag to each other about how shitty their dinner was last night.

“Last night I had a half bag of microwave popcorn.”

“I ate three leaves of lettuce.”

“I just ate right out of the cat’s litter box.”

But lo- the uppity one deigns to speak- “I had a delicious meal that actually tasted good.”

Astonished, she must then pacify her friends, ready to eviscerate her for her audacity. “Relax, girls! It was just a Lean Cuisine! A shitty frozen microwave dinner. I mean, Jesus, you don’t think I’d actually enjoy eating, would you?”

And then they all giggle and discuss the latest corset styles and what it would be like if they had the right to vote.

Today’s whole post, actually, was just an excuse to crib this bit.

[Gracias, Esme]


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  1. kcb

    Quoth Flux: Spending this much intellectual effort critiquing the not-very-catchy catch phrase from a beer commercial?

    Intellectual effort is relative. I guess if one were to choose to blog under a synonym for severe diarrhea, Twisty’s beer post might seem like a big strain. (Forgive me, I couldn’t stop myself.) Blamers know that TF can accomplish with the flick of a hand what lesser bloggers only dream of doing — being funny, critical and erudite on a regular basis.

  2. joeblu.net

    I really enjoyed the piece from August Pollock. It’s sad that the idea of normal food consumption is never represented. One must either glut oneself or starve oneself constantly.

  3. johnieB

    Agggghhhhhh! The picture! Make it go away. Please.

  4. apophenia

    Damn, Twisty, you can write. I know it, the regulars here know it, and you know you know it, but I wanted to say it anyway.

  5. windingroad.typepad.com

    Speaking of men and eating–
    Has anyone, especially you dear Twisty, noted the Milky Way bar commercial where the guy gets shot down and he opens a Milky Way candy bar? Inside is a giggly “woman” to tell him what a stud he really is and he eats her, head first?

  6. VK

    I clicked the links. Now I must rip out my eyes. I fool.

    “Man Law: Let no man wear a dress unless he is a scotlander”

    SCOTTISH. *twitch*

  7. bitchphd.blogspot.com

    Today’s whole post, actually, was just an excuse to crib this bit.

    See? You feminists really just want a man to do all your thinking for you.

  8. MzNicky

    Jeezus Twisty. I had to read the whole post before I realized that Lean Cuisine thing wasn’t actually your dinner. I was scared.

  9. pandagon.net

    Every guy who’s left a stupid comment on my blog about how I’m over-reading the “poke it/own it” commercial leaves me flabbergasted. To the last one, they think that if the price one must pay to ignore sexism is to deliberately make one’s self into a fuckard with an IQ of 10, then that’s not too high a price to pay.

  10. I had never seen the commercial that Jaye posts about, but because I don’t know what’s good for me, I googled it. Misery loves company, so here it is:


    Feel free to click, but be warned that it is cringe-worthy.

  11. Suebob

    Oh how I hate the Monday diet round up in the break room. “Ooh, I was bad, I ate half a fudge brownie at my sister’s barbecue.”

    “I was good. I went to a pizza birthday party but I only had one slice and I picked off the pepperoni and had a diet coke.”

    “I don’t even want to tell you how bad I was. I will be eating Jenny’s Cuisine for a month to make up for it.”

    It makes me sick, the equating good with self-restriction and bad with eating whatever one chooses. The phrase “She has really let herself go” has become a complete condemnation as if doing what one chooses is the worst of sins.

  12. mypinkshoe.blogspot.com

    This reminded me of a post that I read a long time ago, about those insipid Yoplait Commercials

    Yoplait commercials set women back eight hundred years

    Why do men think all women do is sit around and gush about what we eat?

  13. unsanesafe.blogspot.com

    I once heard an actual male say, “I’ve been really good today. I think I’ll allow myself a cup of tea!”

  14. It’s been said before – for women in the USA (and other industrialized nations) the concept of sexual sin and damnation has been replaced by edible sin.

    Following strict socially codified eating habits has (for the most part) replaced other moral codes. Many drink skim milk, take the skin off the chicken, deny themseves dressing on a salad in an effort to be “good”.

  15. Jezebella

    I call this “I was good, I was sooo bad, I’m on this diet this week” crap “Diet Chatter.” I refuse to engage in it. I’ve finally figured out that “ooh, I hate how fat I am” actually translates into “let’s talk about diets and calories for the next hour!”. Having grown up with a mother who is constantly on with Diet Chatter, it just sets my fucking teeth on edge.

    A bunch of the women I work with like to stand around the coffee maker (one room over from my office) and Diet Chatter morning, noon, and night. I used to go in there and sabotage it, for example, by asking them if they’ve tried the Sex Diet (in which lots of orgasms make you feel so good that you don’t give a flying fuck how fat your ass is). Other times I just shut my door pointedly. I think they’ve figured out it annoys the fuck out of me, as I haven’t had to intervene too much lately. What kills me is that they say the same thing, day in, day out, and I don’t think they even realize it.

    Don’t even get me started on women who engage in Diet Chatter in the presence of men, thereby providing evidence for the stereotype that all women are shallow, weight-obsessed, and boring to boot.

    Oh, and I love the term “edible sin.” it fits exactly.

  16. norbizness.com

    (1) Marseeah: Ixnay on that estionquay on the acoblogtay!

    (2) I’m more concerned about the racist, criminal omission of anyone of Latino descent on the Miller Lite Board of Man-Rules. I’m sure that a George Lopez or a (heaven forbid) Paul Rodriguez could have brought some much-needed, spicy sanity to the Poke It/Own It debate.

    (3) Every time I hear the phrase “I’ve been bad…,” I secretly hope that I’m going to hear about international bank fraud next, and not a 3 o’clock pudding cup.

  17. wolfangel.calltherain.net

    Jezebella, have you ever tried to eat a meal with those sorts of people? I’ve decided to choose only friends who enjoy food when they eat it. Picky? Fine, I don’t care. As long as once you have a meal you’ll eat it and enjoy it, it’s all good. It makes life so very much more pleasant.

  18. Having grown up with a mother who is constantly on with Diet Chatter, it just sets my fucking teeth on edge.

    Amen, Jezebella, Suebob, and others. Mom was always calling herself “good” and “bad” according to what she ate, and how much of it. To her credit, she never once suggested that I might be good or bad according to the same criteria, but little kids hear that shit, and internalize it. It took me until well into my 20’s to realize what a crock it was — and the constant diet chatter around me (not to mention facelift chatter — I live in SoCal) makes me realize that most women never, ever do.

  19. hattie.typepad.com/hatties_web

    I cribbed the same bit. It is irresistible. It takes a lotta love on my part to put up with my friends who are on diets. I went to Europe with one and she spent the whole time in a state of food resistance that ruined the trip for me.

  20. saraarts.com

    Wow. That is one repellent expanse of putative food. Nevertheless, it’s still more attractive than the diminutive child molester.

    I am always completely shocked to discover that gentlemen such as this “flux” person you quote are not kidding. It is as weird to me that people walk around saying stuff like this and believing it as it would be if the pug dogs downstairs suddenly began speaking to me in human voices for the express purpose of begging me to sneak them back issues of Dog Fancy magazine. No, I take that back. I’m actually more likely to accept the latter scenario.

    (Meanwhile, I wonder: Does this guy know “flux” is yet another slang word for menstruation? Just asking.)

  21. hedonisticpleasureseeker.wordpress.com

    I used to share an office with food obsessives – – – NGAH!!!!!!! If they weren’t obsessing over what they had for dinner last night, what they were making for dinner tomorrow, it was about their on-again, off-again diets with their “points.” The one common denominator, whether they were binging or dieting, was the OBSESSION. I almost wanted to suggest that, if they really wanted to lose weight, they ought go on those drugs for OCD.

  22. Meganann

    Nice milkyway ad CafeSiren. I like the differences between the guy’s date and his candy bar woman. You can tell the date is a feminist/lesbian by her short hair, glasses, and lack of visible tit. The candybar woman has long hair, tits out, and speaks with a accent. So then the man devours her soul make up for the fact that his date won’t fuck him as is his right.

    Maybe she went out to dinner and actually ate something rather than having a chicken ceasar salad and a glass of white zin.

  23. What struck me about the men commenting on Hedonistics blog was that they seemed to be complaining that she was violating man law. Each of them seemed to have a different man law in mind. One claimed the traditional this doesn’t matter, that does, pay attention to that. Another instructed her on her personal failings. Then of course, there was the no sense of humor, get over it guy. Do they have these standard responses to anything a feminist says all queued up, ready to paste in any comment thread wherein a woman asserts an opinion contrary to the patriarchially approved opinion? Do they know they all sound alike?

  24. But the Flux dude understands you, Twisty! He just doesn’t know it yet. See, here, from a bit of the last chapter of the novel he’s writing:

    “You live for vengeance, Little One. As did your mother before you.”

    (I enjoyed spitting beer in his eye of the beholder.)

  25. Allison

    It’s been said before – for women in the USA (and other industrialized nations) the concept of sexual sin and damnation has been replaced by edible sin.

    You say “edible sin” like it’s a *bad* thing. Mmmmm. Edible sin.

    (I see absolutely no point in eating something unless I thoroughly enjoy it.)

  26. Apparently my having satirized Boo-Yah Nation with a bunch of totally made-up shit about an obscure French historical figure with a finger stuck in a beer bottle amounts to an egregiously wasteful intellectual expenditure.

    And just what does Boo-Yah Nation Bozo Boy expect us to do with our lives without your egregiously wasteful intellectual expenditures to help us survive living in Boo-Yah Nation? Never mind, I can guess.

  27. faultline.org/place/toad

    I think I had that one in the On Beyond Zebra alphabet of interruptions that the software ate a few weeks ago. “But this is so triiiiiviallll!”


  28. Esme

    It struck me reading this because at the same time I’m in the middle of an essay which describes the societal construction of male desire as dominating through taking up more space and women wasting away as sexiness. What strikes me more about thoe whole minimalization of women is that there’s the fact that those parts of you which are required to be large (breasts) are expected to be prosthetic. Less of you. More of plastic.

    And that guy Flux is a moron, as is my significant other who stated that most noxious of phrases, “he has a point.”

  29. Twisty dear, you didn’t really eat that, did you?

  30. But … but … I LIKE Lean Cuisine.


  31. hattie.typepad.com/hatties_web

    God. People can’t cook meals any more but have to eat that crap? We live in dark times.

  32. Emma Goldman

    All I know is I want to try Jezebella’s Sex Diet. No, wait, I don’t want to “try” it, I want to live it.

  33. Summer

    Diet chatter is one reason I don’t have more female friends. It’s right up there with Blind-Praise Kid Chatter, Why-Won’t-My-Husband-Help-Out-Around-The-House-More Marital Woes chatter, Look-What-I-Got-On-Sale-Oh!-My-Husband-Was-So-Mad-When-He-Found-Out-I-Spent-More-Money Fantastic Shopper chatter, I-Was-SO-Fucking-Wasted Alcoholic chatter, and Did-You-Hear-About-So-and-So-We-Are-So-Superior chatter.

    I’m a woman of very little patience when it comes to these sorts of things. And of even less when it comes to male-spoken You-Dumb-Chicks-and-Yer-Opinions chatter (Flux, I’m sneering at you.)

    I imagine one of these days I might spontaneously combust from it all.

  34. Chialea

    (Lurker coming out of hiding, assuming that I can get the posting mechanism to cooperate.)

    That’s an Amy’s frozen dinner, not a Lean Cuisine, right? (It’s not one of the tasty ones, either.) I won’t touch Lean Cuisine with a 10-foot-pole, but when I’m swamped with work, Amy’s is just fine. Basically, it tastes like food that someone put in the freezer and then reheated. The important part of this is that it tastes like FOOD, and not shredded cardboard covered with food-perfume.

  35. myaimistrue.com

    Twisty, that picture made me cry. A lot.

  36. hedonisticpleasureseeker.wordpress.com

    Summer, don’t forget the “Then she said THIS, and then HE said THAT and then omigod you won’t believe this! She did this! Then he did that! Omigod!” Gossip, augh. It feels just like high school all over again and I want to blow my brains out. But I don’t think it’s only women who do this; most of the men I know are just as bad!

  37. Right up there with diet chatter as far as internalizing patriarchy, are those chain e-mails my baby daddy’s cousin sends me about what a b*tch we women are when we’re on PMS.

    Hey did you ever wonder if maybe PMS is when women get a moment of clarity?

    Any time a woman stands up for herself it’s blamed on hormones.

  38. Summer

    Hedonistic: You’re right. Which is why I probably should have written that, regardless of the chatterer’s gender, my impatience for chatterings is one reason I don’t have more chums.

    With that, my ch- quotient for the day has been met.

  39. TheGlimmering

    Erg, this whole debate over commercials irritates the living daylights out of me. Why don’t these numbnuts get it that adults have the the privilege of ignoring these commercials, but children don’t? If I didn’t think anyone would internalize these messages, why would I care? But over and over again, studies confirm that children prefer commercials to regular programming, don’t know that commercials are fictional, and remember them better than regular programming. So all these misogynistic (and I personally consider them misandrist as well) commercials look like instruction manuals on how men are supposed to behave when viewed by little boys. You can probably directly trace these sorts of messages to bullying in the schoolyard. The response I get for pointing out that Mr. Manly Man’s son will be one of the victims of these messages, just about brainwashed into this vision of masculinity and never measuring up among other kids? Mr. Manly Man neatly forgets we were talking about his sprogs and lambasts me for being such a bad mother I let my children see such commercials! Aside from the fact that my daughter’s view of the TV set is obscured by my abdominal wall at the moment, they throw this advertising on the History, Discovery, and Travel channels as much as anything else (apparently men watch educational TV more than women?) so having any TV at all is kind of undermining. Secondly, we don’t have a live feed TV, we have a projector that plays whatever’s on the computer or PlayStation, so we’re not part of the problem feeding that message to our children, it’s everyone else’s zombie children that will grow up influencing the world for the worst.

    Sorry, sore spot. Why can’t we get good role models in our media again?

    As far as that diet nonsense goes, we’ve ritualized our resistance in observing tea time everyday with some wonderfully decadent accompaniment.

  40. My personal favorite way to deal with Diet Obsessives around me (particularly at work) is to let the perpetrators know that I consider diet chatter to be hate language, indicative of self-hatred and self-loathing as well as general woman-hatred. For me, fat is not only a feminist issue but also a classist, racist, sexist issue. And just like I wouldn’t sit quietly while they badmouthed welfare moms or any particular ethnic group, I’m not about to passively endure that particular kind of hate talk without speaking up, dammit.

    It’s worked well, to my surprise. The resistance to being labeled a bigot is an excellent motivator.

    I blame You-Know-Who (no, not Voldemort)

  41. Twisty

    We don’t have tea time here in Austin. I have often lamented that there are not enough meals in the American day. Although Stingray and I usually infest one or the other of a handful of grimy coffee houses around tea time. I order an iced hibiscus tea (pronounced HY-biskis here), which is served in a marginally clean pint glass. When I step outside to the patio, the ice melts instantly and I am attacked by bugs. So I think it’s not really the same thing.

  42. members.cox.net/thevixen/Cayenne/1.html

    Lean Cuisine, huh? Now I know what food would look like on chemo.

  43. My favorite channel, which I talk about endlessly and boringly, is Discovery Science Channel. It seems to have fewer offensive commercials than most. My fiance and I were watching it last night (of course!) and he noted that if one can glean any demographic information from commercials, than watchers of the Discovery Science Channel must all be bald, overweight men. He also pointed out (as a bald man himself) that all the commercials for hair loss remedies that show a woman fawning over her newly-hirsute man require that the woman be noticeably well-stacked. “Look at that woman they have rubbing her big boobs on that guy!” he said. I guess he would have spent a lot more time noticing and analyzing the content of those types of commercials than I. I wasn’t really too offended by that commercial, though, since hair-loss treatment commercials will inevitably appeal to masculine vanity.

  44. I’m glad that the subject of “foodophilia” (the tendency of certain people to obsess about food in an adverserial and neurotic manner, turning every meal into a fad diet seminar featuring the latest in junk science and hypochondria) has come up since it has long been a pet peeve of mine, and one of the reasons I opt for eating alone these days. Here’s a partial list of foodophiles who have contributed to my decision:

    ‘B’ – an overweight vegetarian who has stayed at my house a few times while in town. I’m what you might call a “quasi-vegetarian” – I eat mostly vegetarian, but if I’m at someone’s house out and meat is on the menu, I just eat it. Pasta is usually a safe bet with stricter vegetarians, but “B” turned down the offer for reasons having to do with his “lipodes” or something. I admit, I zoned out during his jargon-laden lecture. Strangely, his lipodes couldn’t handle pasta made with fresh tomatoes, basil, olive oil and garlic, but they could handle extra large Starbuck’s mocha frappucinos and a daily six pack of beer,

    ‘C’ – A neighbor who came over for dinner once after I regretfully extended her the invitation. While guzzling the Cru Premiere Haute Medoc I’d been saving for a “special-ish” occasion, I had to listen to her entire sordid history of alcoholism before she bolted to the nearest liquor store to replenish her empty glass with Wild Turkey and Diet Coke. All the while, she made conspicious trips to the toilet, leaving the door slightly ajar after I purposefully failed to comment on it the first time; a move presumably aimed at kick starting an unwanted conversation about her entire sordid history of fake eating disorders.

    ‘K’ – Suggests we meet for lunch only to arrive with some mysterious, life threatening ailment that can only be alleviated by lengthy, food centred conversations about her health. I order a salade de chevre chaud, the sight of which causes fresh waves of nausea to overtake her, while insisting that she just have a “bite”. This is followed by endless fumbling for non-existent prescription allergy medication and demands for more water refills from a clearly annoyed waiter. I feel like the 400 lb gorilla in the room, indulging my perverse passion for goat cheese, oblivious to the medical emergency before me. The following day she swims 50 laps, while I’m nursing a non-alcohol related hangover.

    ‘J’ – Accepts my invitation to drop by after work. I put out some light food (“edamame”, brie, baguette) and the favor is returned by a two hour long presentation on the state of his colon. I forgive him because he arrived with a very decent ’95 St Emilion.

  45. saltyC,

    I’ve stopped doing this now, but I know for a while I used PMS as an excuse to get out all the last 3 weeks pent up rage due to my inability to express such rage due to patriarichal programming. Thank heavens I’m over that “inability to express rage” thing now though.

    As for the “food sin” topic, I really, really feel sorry for people who are stuck in this mindset. I’m lucky that I’m mostly over that, but I know for alot of people my age the indoctrination came mostly from our mothers (who were, in turn, indoctrinated by the Patriarchy). I remember very distinctly when I was 7 years old, back when I was still in figure-skating lessons, my mother getting *so angry* at myself and a friend for talking about how we were “So good” for “only having carrots for snack” because we were “too young for that”, without even realising herself that we’d gotten this language/behaviour from sitting around listening to our mothers talking about their diets. They were always, always on diets. My mother has been “on a diet” of some form or other as long as I can remember. I think the thing that stuck most was the “too young for that” line, implying that it was an inevitable thing to happen, like ear-peircing (which I don’t think is inevitable, either, but it was to her) or menstruation.

  46. there’s a beer or soda or other canned-beverage commercial nowadays in which a man makes his girlfriend cry and run out of the room. it’s a canned-beverage for men who think it’s funny to make women cry.

    summer, you certainly list a lot of conversations that make me wince pretty hard. it’s gender-free, though. i want to claw out the eyes of coworkers and friends who talk about baseball, too. baseball is a yawn-making white trash sport, and no one should assume that anyone else wants to hear a word about it. would you talk about nascar? no? then don’t talk about baseball.

  47. maarmie

    I love your post. I hate the Burger King ad.

  48. saraarts.com

    Y’all are cracking me up.

    Twisty, I think you and Stingray should consider — in your spare time and only to add on another facet apiece, of course — opening a tea room in Austin. Remember, undaunted by heat or insects, or even by the odd native hurling weapons and screaming “Get the hell out of here, whitey!” in local parlance, the British Empire brought the civilized practice of tea time to many a warm and barbarous location. In most cases, all it took was determination, mosquito netting and rifle power. In your case, I’m thinking you would just need a gracious old bungalow with a good roof and plumbing, a screen porch and central air conditioning.

    I can see this: Twisty’s Tiffin Box, or Twisty’s Tea Shack, or Tea Hut, or something. You could serve a range of fine herbals and true teas, too, plus exquisite little salads of diminutive tomatoes and buffalo mozzarella or whatever delicacy might strike your creative fancy on a given day. There could be small, satisfying servings of hot and cold soups and chili. There could be petite, taco-like finger foods. There could also be gleaming porcelain tiers filled with tiny cakes and scones with lemon curd and clotted cream for the more decadent traditionalists.

    You would only have to be open in the afternoon.

    It could be delightful. And you could document the whole thing on your Holga.

  49. Ann Bartow

    I’m posting this comment from a whole different country than usual and I did not have to log in to do so. Not sure if these two things are correlated or not but it makes leaving the US even more attractive! Anyway, I just had to note that “August J. Pollack” (those are not scare quotes, they are I-think-that-is-a-pen-name quotes) is fairly consistently cool and funny. I’ve been making an effort to give props to liberal dudes who actually are, and he seems to qualify. Any news re: Blamecon? I mean, obviously we all have better uses for our time than Blamecon, but still…

  50. I would unhesitatingly visit Twisty’s Tea Bungalow on my next visit to Austin, even though it would require hauling my cranky friend Dave out to it, since he’s who I stay with when in Austin.

  51. urban-hills.blogspot.com

    That ‘meal’ looks like a turd. Nice.

    I feel I must weigh in on two counts: firstly, the idea that Twisty could open her own tea shoppe. An excellent suggestion. I speak as one who has supped tea on a mountain top in Sri Lanka, while fending off mosquitos, little chipmunk-like creatures, and something that looked like a sparrow, only more colourful. It required co-ordination in bi-handed-batting movement, liberal pre-application of mozzy-repellant, and the distraction technique of the accompanying biscuit portion. But did these factors cause the ruination of the tea experience? Not one bit. If it can be done there, I am confident it can be done in Texas, especially if Twisty is involved. Although I confess that if I’d encountered one of those giant cockroaches on Liz’s blog (do you have those, Twisty?) then tea-supping would have been swiftly aborted. Perhaps flamethrowers could be employed in the direction of the larger predators?

    And secondly, in the vein of ‘advertising’, I have long hated the advertisement for this supermarket, which runs in the UK: http://www.iceland.co.uk/

    I apologise for not being able to locate a video of the advert, but please allow me to summarise.

    ‘That’s why MUM’s gone to Iceland!’ is sung in a sing-song voice, with special emphasis on the word ‘MUM’ so that children and men are indoctrinated with the idea that it’s mum’s role to do this, while dad takes care of the more stereotypically manly tasks (let’s face it, I don’t think he’s staying home to do the hoovering) like tree-chopping and bonfire-building. It’s not even subtle.

    The adverts also feature the boobage of Kerri Catona in prominant position, to back up Iceland’s idea of woman. She is a C-list celebrity here in Blighty who is famous for a second-rate pop career and the size of her chest.

    It pains me greatly that Iceland is my nearest supermarket. However, I derive significant pleasure from depriving it of my cash in favour of the nearest Waitrose. I will happy travel 5 extra miles to avoid giving money to the scumhole that is Iceland.

  52. urban-hills.blogspot.com

    Prominent, I meant.

  53. justbetweenstrangers.blogspot.com

    please just say that the photograph in no way corresponds to the sad depths of gustatory suffering that you have inflicted on yourself (either in response to this fuckard or otherwise)…

  54. Mollie


    Ditto to infinity. There’s a few noncommercial channels for kids, unfortunately the programming is mostly fuckarded.

  55. kathymccarty.info

    The “You poke it, you Own it” Commercial is BLATANTLY MYSOGYNIST, in a way that would have made 1970’s Feminists’ Hair STAND ON END !!!! In fact the whole commercial is simply an excuse to SAY “You poke it, you own it!”, which isn’t ACTUALLY said by ANYONE ! Every single MAN I know, who has seen it, is APPALLED by it and can barely believe it is on TV. It’s THAT AWFUL! In my opinion anyone who DEFENDS it, must be retarded AND evil. Seriously. It is NOT, I repeat NOT, a small and petty thing to object to. It is HORRIBLE !!
    (I only mention “the men I know” to make the point that, even those MOST likely to view it as innocuous, did not see it as innocuous.)

  56. Someday, I think I’ll make a T-shirt that says:

    Its NOT PMS. You’re just an asshole.

  57. The Happy Feminist

    I just can’t stop giggling at the fact that this guy thought that the droites du doigt (literally, “The Rights of the Finger”) was REAL.

  58. Sandi

    Never fear! Do not worry! He is not the enemy! Oh, lord, no! He is sympathetic, actually. He just wanted to let us know that we’re over-reacting, lest we bring upon ourselves the wrath of the actual patriarchs. Him? He’s a feminist, just like us. No, better: a feminist with an all-mighty cock.

    Ladies, we have arrived.

  59. faultline.org

    I can see this: Twisty’s Tiffin Box, or Twisty’s Tea Shack, or Tea Hut, or something.

    What, five whole hours and no one’s suggested ‘Twisty’s Tea’N’Tacos?”

    With “Twisty’s TNT” as a nickname? How could it lose?

  60. BitchBitesBack

    I share acm’s concern. You didn’t _eat_ that?

  61. Did anyone see the Frontline special on AIDS tonight? Part 2 is on tomorrow (Wednesday, that is).

  62. selfresurrection.blogspot.com

    Come to think of it, the tea houses of this country might represent a sort of underground railroad to feminism hitherto unexplored, a tradition we might just proudly reclaim. After all, where did the suffragettes percolate their uppity notions? Disguised in chintz, lace, and china, these bastions of caloric liberation pass unnoticed beneath the eyes of the patriarchal oppressors who fear to cross their threshhold lest the estrogen cloud shrivel their reason for living. (An excellent fear tactic, my hat tips to whoever developed it, in my experience it’s been so successful it’s the only meal my mother and I can enjoy out without my father pushing his way along. In fact, the only bedicked ones I’ve ever seen grace the establishment were my partner and a waitron with a fabulous tenor.) Which is a roundabout way of saying: a) Texas is obviously in need of a teahouse, b) my favorite teahouse “Sally Lunn’s” is franchising, and c) I would attend any tea hosted by Twisty. The Blamers Tea Klatch, has a sort of “Ladies’ Sewing Circle and Terrorist Society” ring to it. No doubt tea is the secret tool of patriarchy blaming as revealed by its feminine devotees and insane accompaniments. I mean clotted cream for all that’s holy!

  63. metamanda

    My mom grew up in the third world, poor, with lots of siblings. That puts food neuroses in perspective pretty quick. I got exactly *zero* “food chatter” growing up. (also her/our culture tends to treat food as a tangible manifestation of love, so if you refuse to eat, people look askance at you).

    She’s become more picky and calorie-concerned lately, which I think is a pity, but I still don’t perceive any real guilt or shame. She still likes to eat, and simply can’t wrap her head around people who don’t. Neither can I.

    There’s this fabulous quote from Brillat-Savarin, written at a time when (I think) it was still considered improper for women to dine in public:

    “Nothing is more agreeable to look at than a pretty gormande in full battle-dress: her napkin tucked in most sensibly; [her hand] carries elegantly carved morsels to her mouth, or perhaps a partridge wing on which she nibbles; her eyes shine; her lips are soft and moist… the ladies who know how to eat are comparatively ten years younger than those to whom this science is a stranger.”

    obvious concerns about male gaze aside, I find that quote wonderfully life affirming. I’m going to go find me some morsels right now.

  64. Gueuze

    metamanda, is it Brillat-Saverin whose famous collection of letters & wisdom are adored by the narrator’s grandmother and mother in Proust’s _In Search of Lost Time_?

  65. hedonisticpleasureseeker.wordpress.com

    Heck, we could just call it the Ladies Auxiliary and go WAY underground. They’ll never know.

    (Auxiliary to what? Heh.)

  66. “My mom grew up in the third world, poor, with lots of siblings. That puts food neuroses in perspective pretty quick.”

    Chris Rock said something to the effect of…

    “Some people say red meat will kill ya….red meat will kill ya. Shit, GREEN MEAT will kill ya. If you’re fortunate enough to be in the minority of people on this planet who can get your lips wrapped around a steak, eat the shit outta that m—-f—-r!!”


  67. or not.

  68. Keeshond

    Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, Twisty and fellow blamers. Diet chatter drives me up the flippin’ wall and I get treated like a heretic if I dare suggest that weight loss isn’t necessarily a topic I find constantly fascinating. A group of my coworkers started a “Biggest Loser” contest at work at the beginning of the year and all I heard for weeks was yipping and barking about fat, points, weight loss, calories, scale victories and frustrations. I was also invited to join a “Biggest Loser” contest outside of work by a friend of mine (I’m a size 14), and I just thought it took a lot of nerve to a) remind me how fat and patriarchally-unapproved I am and b) to assume I gave enough of a crap to diet. I declined the invite and told her to enjoy her weekly orgy of self-hatred. I celebrated the fact that I wasn’t at the first stupid meeting with pizza and beer.

    And I’ve tried Lean Cuisine. Not only does it suck taste wise, it’s also not enough food to sustain a sedentary hamster for more than 1/2 an hour!

  69. johnieB

    The recent additions have made the trip past the (shudder) picture worthwhile, as anticipated.
    And the charm of contemplating such an agreeable haven is truly a pleasure Brillat-Savarin would have cherished. I’ve been re-reading one of his most illustrious successors, M.F.K. Fisher, for several days; I think it has impacted my style.
    Clearly, the patriarchy is to blame for the appalling lack of such temples of wisdom in this disagreeable country.

  70. hedonisticpleasureseeker.wordpress.com

    The trolls are still coming on my end; I get about 200 visitors a day searching on “Man Laws.” Today I received this comment:

    “Get a life. If women were less concerned about their equality in this world where it is a fact of life, then I don’t know what to say. I guess I can take pleasure in the fact that this silly commercial actually angered you and gives you a reason to further hate us “assholes”.

    There is an instinctual dynamic in human relations you seem to have transcended. At least in your mind you have”.


    Besides “get a life” I don’t know what the heck he means.

    Any advice?

  71. Claudia

    I don’t understand, do these people like the commercial so much they need to defend it?

    In my state in Oz a commercial was recently banned after someone complained of the racism in it. The was a large story in the the paper emphasising that that only one person complained. I was then subjected to stupider than usual letters to the editor complaining about the banning, as well as stupid people at my workplace doing the same. The complaints were the same as the ones here; how petty, there are more important things, and so on.

    I managed to shut up my collegues by asking them what exactly it was about the commercial that was so fantastic that their life has been diminished by not viewing it.

    Yeah, they think I’m shrill.

  72. johnieB

    Advice with what? This is clearly an acute case of advanced denial, leading to massive delusion. I reckon it well nigh impossible to communicate with these patriarchal dweebs. If they don’t amuse you, I suggest ignoring them till they die off.
    Or until citizen responsibility advances to a more active intervention; one may hope they will be useful in a garden. As fertilizer.

  73. saoba

    Oh sweet diety of your choice, I am so sick of diet chatter.

    I’ve gotten into lifting weights. There is nothing in the world sweeter to this fifty year old grandmother than someone saying “You look great! Have you lost weight?” and being able to smile placidly and reply “No, actually, now that I’m lifting I’ve put on about ten pounds.”

    The horrified silence this is greeted with is a balm to my soul. Now, if pressed I will cheerfully talk about how good I feel and how much stronger I am. What I do not say, because it simply doesn’t matter to me, is that I am wearing smaller sizes. It’s just a number, people, not an indication of worth.

    But people will flounder and act as if I have committed some huge social misstep. How can I Not. Fucking. Care that the number on the scale has gone up? Never mind fitness, dammit, the number on the scale has gone up and that must be bad, right?

  74. James

    The Technobabe and I don’t know the commercials of which y’all speak because we don’t watch TV. We have apparently been enjoying The Sex Diet since we met, and even moreso now that we live together. Also, thanks for reminding us why we don’t hang out with the neighbors.

  75. Liz

    These are the reasons I love Marge Piercy and all her scathing commentary on body image problems (hmm, is Marge secretly Twisty Faster? If not, I hope you are friends). She’s always got the right poetic comment for the problem at hand:

    “What are Big Girls Made of?”

    “If only we were not programmed and reprogrammed
    to need what is sold us.
    Why should we want to live inside ads?
    Why should we want to scourge our softness
    to straight lines like a Mondrian painting?
    Why should we punish each other with scorn
    as if to have a large ass
    were worse than being greedy or mean?”

    Stick that in front of the coffee maker and see if it cuts down on the Diet Chatter.

    And now I feel the need to go eat a couple cookies.

  76. Donna

    Diet chatter, blecch! I concur with whoever it was on this thread who said they preferred eating alone. I also echo the sentiment of the poster (sorry I’m too lazy to scroll up to get the names) who described her mother growing up in the third world. My dad was a Depression kid so there was none of this picking at your food like a bird nonsense or leaving half of it on your plate tolerated at my home. Why did you take so much if you weren’t going to eat it? Of course, that was somewhat problematic for me too because it took me a long time to learn that I didn’t have to always clean my plate either. Still, I’m a bit of a revelation to some other females on the rare occasion that I venture into communal eating. “You’re going to order THAT? Mmmmm that looks tasty. I’m so jealous of you. I’ll just have this salad because I have to be good since I had a cookie on break this morning.” And then I actually EAT what I ordered. Right in front of them. Sometimes I even have dessert. And I don’t do share-sies with it, either. Nope, that’s my tiramisu, get your own. Blows their diet-addled minds.

    As for the Miller Lite commercials, blame on. The minute you see Burt Reynolds you know it’s going downhill from there. I’m waiting for the new Man Law about how you’re supposed to pretend not to be freaked out by the obvious facelift of the aging B-list lothario in your midst.

  77. trixie

    Okay, I’ll admit it. That frozen dinner looks damn good to me. Said dinner, as others have observed, is an Amy’s veggie loaf, and many’s the time its predecessors have crossed my eager palate. I have a strange predeliction for meatballs and meatloaf (or in this case, vegetable protien disguised as meatloaf), such that the frozen nature of such deters me not. My taste for processed meats even drives me to consume the odd can of Vienna sausages.

    Yes, I am a monster. Don’t blame me, blame the patriarchy.

  78. Lisa

    You know, I am only a very part-time patriarchy blamer myself (too much of it makes my head explode) and I missed your french history lesson involving finger poking mysogenists.

    But it was a few days ago that I was calmly laid out in bed relaxing after a hard day when I saw that commercial. It pissed me off so much I had to go and call two or three people and rant to them while stomping up and down my living room floor about the gawd-awfulness of that damned commercial. “you poke it, You own it?” Oh, that has to be a NEW MAN LAW???? Um, hasn’t that been the MAN LAW for um, the last…well, all of history? Wasn’t it just in the last 30 years that a woman could legally accuse her husband of rape? (and in some countries, this still isn’t so). What the fuck?

    HOW??? HOW am I supposed to raise two boys????? HOW? When shit like this is on the air. It has pretty much been the nail in the coffin on my TV ownership. All the other stupid shit that is censored and this gets by?

    Anyway, enough ranting. My point is, that compared to you, I am a patriarchy blaming lightweight. You could probably wipe the floor with me in that area. And in NO WAY were you overreacting. I’m a 35 year-old suburban sahm of all things and I was appalled.

  79. I get it. We are supposed to be good feminists, attacking extreme third world patriarchy through generous aid and good works. Good feminists raise the status of women – other women, far away.

    Bad feminists attack patriarchy that personally affects them at home. That makes us selfish. It also makes us petty for being concerned about “pampered” western women and not being good femartyrs abroad.

    We are especially bad when we attack pop culture patriarchy, because the hugeantic ad industry isn’t the least bit influential in society, ads are trivial as everyone knows, and we are hitting way too close to home for small-minded wanker comfort. If we aim at TV and ads that everyone sees, people might actually notice and understand what we are saying and that might lead to a reduction in privileges experienced by insecure males who don’t want to compete fairly at home!

  80. ismnotwasm

    Flux has a problem. (Aside from his user name)I believe it’s called projection, since the overreaction is coming from over his general direction. Pointing out complete idiocy, especially complete mysogynist idiocy in commercials has social value, and makes for interesting conversations. Particularly on feminist blogs.

    Minimizing said commercials with that good old “get over it” mentality, is stupid. I would say ignorant, but naw. Stupid. Funny how he- obviously the manlist of men- evidently thinks he is striking the real blow against sexist commercials, by pointing out that there are worse ones out there.

    So, is the general idea that men chow on cholesteral laden manly meat and straight to your belly beer, while the little women make do with fibrous little fare (washed down with Chrystal lite) all calorie counted and preprepared?
    Another commercial:
    Honey, do these pants make my butt look big? (Guy shoves a candy bar in his mouth) “When you need some time”

    Fuck that.

  81. MissPrism

    There are huge sectors of the Web devoted to Star Trek characters, obsolete sit-coms and sports statistics that are far pettier than current beer adverts! If these guys are going to complain about pettiness, they should stop overreacting and focus on real pettiness.

  82. jezebella

    Ew, CafeSiren, “facelift chatter”? Oh, heaven forbid! And I thought Diet Chatter was bad. I’m so sorry.

    How come I can’t work with you all? Why am I surrounded by the brainwashed, the self-loathing, the patriarchy-internalized? And why would these same people think I want to go to the beach with them for the weekend (as they are doing this week)?? They’re all off: the “I’m too fat to be naked in front of my husband;” the functional anorexic who orders food like a normal person then pushes it around the plate while eating, at most, 10 tiny bites; the “new fad diet a week girl;” and the woman who eats nothing but meat and bread (literally), but bitches about her weight constantly? Why would I subject myself to 48 hours of this? Oh mah gaw, I just realized something: it’s the BEACH, they’ll be whining about BATHING SUITS and their ASSES all fucking weekend. Seriously, I’d rather chew my own leg off.

    Oh, and they also engage in “my husband won’t do anything around the house” chatter, too. That shit is endless.

    My only consolation regarding fast food’s “REAL men eat giant slabs of meat” message is that the fools who fall for this will die sooner than the ones who know better.

  83. Hedonistic, you asked for advice. Having studied my Twisty lessons well, I believe I am now in a modestly improved position to offer some:

    “It’s not equality we want, it’s LIBERATION.”

    As for the diet chatter at the table — as usual, Miss Manners has the ultimate word: No evaluative comments on other people’s food or food choices. No volunteering to taste a tiramisu that is not your own.

    Miss Manners is always right, and always for the right reason. She and Twisty may, in fact, be equally worthy of study.

  84. TravelerOfTheWays

    Wow, my first comment at I Blame The Patriarchy! I also blame the patriarchy.

    Anyway, I was discussing the poke-it ad with a friend of mine (the one who turned me on to this site, actually), and something occured to me. I’m sure it’s been said more succintly than this, but the idea really struck me. The ad isn’t just disgusting on its own, but I think it’s actually worse when we take it in a broader context of American TV fiascos.

    People FREAK OUT about a “wardrobe malfunction”, but it’s FUNNY when a bunch of guys are talking about how they OWN what they POKE. That boggles me. Excuse me while I go boggle some more about that.

    And as for the BK “I am man” ad, do people know what quiche is?? Seriously, it seems pretty man-food-ish to me, if we’re trusting BK’s analysis of what makes man food. I guess it just sounds girly, but damn. Ham and cheese quiche, anyone? (Oh no, that would be VERY bad of me! I might actually sprout thighs!)

  85. How has this website possibly escaped notice?

    Write your own Man Laws

  86. Opps.
    Try this one

  87. ae

    Re: poking and owning and man lawing (which is about the stupidest thing I’ve heard in a while), I never cease to be amazed how much the male ego needs to be propped up with these ceaseless and increasingly absurd sops to their hot meat downing/big tit ogling virility. How fragile are these delicate flowers that every spare pixel of advertising space must reinforce their “manliness”? I mean, “Man Law”? Bwaahaha! Come on! Is it even possible to say that w/o a sneer in one’s voice?

    My fave incarnation of the Your Dick Is the Biggest! You’re in Charge Here! School of Advertising are the commercials that show dumbass guys rejecting supermodels for some more desired prize like their car, their shlubby shmoe friends, or a Dr. Pepper. Yeah.

  88. Anna in Cairo

    Ms. Kate, you mentioned,

    “I get it. We are supposed to be good feminists, attacking extreme third world patriarchy through generous aid and good works. Good feminists raise the status of women – other women, far away. Bad feminists attack patriarchy that personally affects them at home. That makes us selfish. It also makes us petty for being concerned about “pampered” western women and not being good femartyrs abroad.”

    I am a US expat who lives in a 3rd world country. And I am tired of this whole issue too. For two reasons. One is that yeah, like you I understand it is like telling a kid to eat his peas because there are people starving in China (in other words it is a weird sort of guilt-tripping way to stop you from dissenting) and here is the second. Those 3rd world women have their own autonomy. They have their own organizations. They do not need Westerners to play white knight (which is a PATRIARCHAL idea to begin with, hello people) they need to be LISTENED to. They NEVER are.

    Back when the Taleban had control of Afghanistan there was this group called RAWA (revolutionary afghan women’s association, I think) and when Bush invaded Afghanistan with the Feminist Majority’s approval no one listened to THEM when they said the Northern Alliance was in no way an improvement and when they begged for people to take a different approach. Take a look at Afghanistan today (especially the part of it that is not urban, which is about 97% of it) and see if they were right or not.

    Can people please treat third world women as PEOPLE and listen to them instead of treating them as victims in need of saving? It is really awfully annoying and many times it is even counter-productive. Third world women have organizations. They are doing things to help themselves at the grassroots level. (e.g. there are several Egyptian women’s groups working in rural areas trying to reduce the number of people who practice FGM on their girls.) But no one acknowledges this. And rightwing interventionists often use feminist messages to justify their invasion and rape of third world countries and too many people buy it.

  89. hedonisticpleasureseeker.wordpress.com

    It also blows my mind, the energy these men are putting into complaining. Masculinity is indeed a fragile construct, in constant need of reinforcements and defense! My last deluded protester, while kind, objected to the energy I expended writing a post about a harmless commercial, and then proceeded to write a novel defending it.

    I think I read this on Pandagon, but the very existence of “Man Laws” proves just how tenuous this idea of masculinity is. Can you imagine a bunch of women making “Women Laws?” Of course not. How lame.

  90. Livia

    Twisty, you are hereby invited to Oxford for tea. There’s a cafe in the High Street with a high mirrored bar and an excellent selection of newspapers, and it serves tiny sandwiches, scones and cake on a layered silver salver accompanied by champagne. On me.

    Diet Culture drives me up the wall and has done for years. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to lose weight; there’s nothing wrong with putting on fifteen pounds. What’s wrong is that we’ve made weight loss into a religion.I used to work in an almost all-male office; when I moved to an all female office I was driven mad by the fact that my co-workers assumed a right, nay, a *responsibility* to comment on what I ate. We police ourselves for non-conformity.

    Women are not encouraged to eat healthily; we are pushed towards expensive “diet” foods and bizarre eating regimes. (Can you think of many diets *less* healthy than Atkins?) A couple of years ago I put on about half a stone over Christmas and lost it in the next couple of months. A colleague asked me what diet I was on and I said “The eating slightly less and walking a bit more one.”

    Don’t even get me started on the cellulite guilt-trip.

  91. whyme63

    I know that’s not a Lean Cuisine, because it contains waay too much food.

    Anyway. I like some Lean Cuisine offerings. They are convenient, reasonably nutritious, lower in sodium than most frozen dinners, and I even (gasp) like the taste. I augment them with fresh salads and steamed veggies, though.

    As for their ads, I have to say I never got that message out those I’ve seen. It seemed to me to be more of the “I’m so busy I couldn’t possible make a good food choice” vs. “I can make a good food choice even though I’m so busy, because I know about these marginally healthier frozen dinners from Stouffer’s.”

    That is an interesting take on it, though.

  92. For all it’s faults, lean cuisine is inexpensive, appropriately portioned, relatively healthy cafeteria food for legions of elders living at home. Most of my elderly relatives swear by them when they are eating alone at home. They know how to cook, but it’s a matter of having only one person to cook for being a hassle.

  93. selfresurrection.blogspot.com

    Actually, I’m tempted to compile a list of “Woman Laws,” more as a sort of Poor Richard’s Almanac source of assorted advice for my incipient daughter if I should fail to be around when she needs it than anything else. Something with innocuous words of wisdom like “It’s better to be overweight than bitter” and “Contrary to what the TV tells you, the razor is really the only useful hair removal device for women in this family, feel free to throw up your hands in disgust with the practice.” Heh, you know… I hate to hawk my blog and all, but if anyone would be interested in submitting similar advice, I’ll start an entry on the subject. Anyway, Livia, I am now more tempted than ever to abandon the States for England, my partner has been suggesting it for ages now he’s so fed up with the way things work here.

  94. grannyvibe.blogspot.com

    One of my more satisfying leisure-time hobbies is firing off scathing opinionated letters to the editor of my very small town’s very provencial little newspaper. And it never fails: no matter what the hell I’m blithering on about, somebody always, ALWAYS, fires back with a responding letter that says, “HOW DARE Ms. Vibrating waste our precious time blithering on about trivial matters like cock fighting, the Sons of the Confederate Veterans, the omission of the promised shade trees around the Wal-Mart parking lot, whatever, when there are STILL DEAD BODIES FLOATING AROUND IN NEW ORLEANS? She needs to get off her lazy ass and do something useful and important for a change. And leave the poor innocent cock fighters and Confederate flag wavers alone.” Always. Without fail.

  95. hedonisticpleasureseeker.wordpress.com

    http://limedforthetruth.com/?p=53 I thought this was a great response to male claims of feminist “pettiness”

  96. johnieB

    Thanks to Paris, I have just seen these ads for the first time. Lawd have mercy.

    May we consider tactics? Boycott Miller? Picket local distributors? Kill your TV? Picket TV stations? Civil legal remedies for the latter on the grounds that it is political advocacy?

  97. Twisty

    “Twisty, you are hereby invited to Oxford for tea. ”

    You mean Oxford, Mississippi? Or the Oxford in Oxfordshire?

  98. The Oxford in Oxfordshire, if she means the cafe I think she means. Champagne tea. Yum.


  99. Actually, I’m tempted to compile a list of “Woman Laws,” more as a sort of Poor Richard’s Almanac source of assorted advice for my incipient daughter if I should fail to be around when she needs it than anything else.

    Unfortunately, somebody already published that worthless piece of wasted tree death called The Rules.


  100. hedonisticpleasureseeker.wordpress.com

    I think this is the only rule we need: click here

  101. Twisty she means Oxfordshire. And if you haul your ass all the way to Oxfordshire you have to visit me too. I can rustle up a second cream tea if it sweetens the deal.

  102. Hedonistic, the only rule that came to mind when viewing that picture was:
    White eyeshadow up to your forehead does NOT further your point. Ever.

    Tho’ I doubt most people actually looked that high up.

  103. Summer

    With all the talk of Lean Q-Sine in this thread, I realized that I had never had the pleasure of either purchasing a frozen meal or eating it. So, last night, I ventured to the frozen-foods section, selected a box based on its over-saturated cover photo, paid, traveled home, heated, and consumed. Just to see what all the hubbub is about, you know. It was salmon-something-or-other, the box said; all I know is that the dang thing disturbed my Force something fierce.

    No, I did not like it. And you can be fer-damn-sure IBTP.

  104. Livia

    Oxford, Oxfordshire, England. I do mean the cafe that Smiler thinks I do. Paris, maybe if Twisty visits we could organise a Patriarchy Blaming Street Party!

    Oh, Twisty, please do visit during the World Cup so I can summon the will to live.

  105. MissPrism

    If you’re having a street party in Oxford, I ask that you wait until September so I can join in.

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