That’s it. I have no choice but to ban myself from my own blog.
What is this?
You are reading I Blame The Patriarchy, the patriarchy-blaming blog that advances the radical feminist views of Twisty Faster, a gentleman farmer and spinster aunt eating dinner in Austin, Texas.
I Blame The Patriarchy is intended for advanced patriarchy-blamers. It is not a feminist primer. See Patriarchy-Blaming the Twisty Way for details.
"I couldn't get Twisty's point. It was so longwinded." -- The Blogosphere
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Funny. This is the first time I’ve felt like commenting.
I bet there was never any such post.
Mandos, Mandos, Mandos.
Accuse Twisty? Next thing you know, you’ll be using ellipses.
At least maybe there won’t be TMI in this thread. :)
Oh, no! I used an emoticon. Please Twisty, don’t ban me like you are banning your own comments.
They can’t stop. They are still going at it in the secondary post. It has now spread to five other blogs. It’s a blowjob virus and it appears to be taking over the blogosphere.
God, I hope the blowjob virus doesn’t get mixed up with the Stephen Hawking space colony virus I launched this past week. It’ll be horrible: discussions over whether zero-gee fellatio is still inherently oppressive what with the lack of “up” and “down,” objective comparisons of the throat capacity of Vulcans and Kzin, and unseemly references to Christopher Hitchens doing standup in Vegas at the Star Trek Experience.
Then the internet itself will collapse into a black hole and the Patriarchy will try to bugger it.
Chris, I’m DYING here, I just choked on my fried rice!
I call for a group hug and a round of Kum-By-Yah.
God this shitstorm fucking sucks. Condolences, Twisty. You can take out your justified rage on me anytime.
Now if we only we could come up with a mutantboobulator to moderate and delete all those nasty ass shit troll cells that been laying Twisty low.
(engineer brain wheels start turning on the concept of filters …)
I went out for sushi. What happened?
ewww. Sushi.
It’s incredible. Last time I checked, Twisty had given us a nice shiny puffy post to take our minds off our troubles. From that to a multi-blog uber-serious feminism-n’-sex war? Jesus Fucking Christ.
Hunh?
Huh.
Hmm.
Ah.
Ah?
Jesus Fucking Christ
Is that what happens everytime somebody says “Good God, go fuck yourself”?
On that note: I love you. With all my heart. You’re the reason they invented the internet.
All right then, moderator, make sense of this:
From the archive, Twisty commenting on “Sex”.
My argument is not that people should not have sex. My argument–in fact, it is my only argument, and pretty much the entire purpose of this blog–is merely that patriarchy exists. My secondary purpose is to expose the methodology by which this often invisible ideology of oppression taints all of human enterprise. I do this by saying shit nobody wants to hear. It’s amazing that anybody reads this blog at all, when you think about it.
And then set Twisty free or I’ll come and rip your bloody arms off.
I’m so sorry you’re getting bombarded over this. We went through a similar slice of bullshit over at the Den when we tried to talk about makeup and fashion just a little while ago.
Isn’t it interesting how when you state your position, so many others automatically assumes you are attacking them?
Good luck, thank you for helping me Blame the Patriarchy, and please unbann yourself soon. I think that banning was unfair!
Oh, Twisty, what did you do, use an ellipsis?
does this mean you’re now going to hang around Protein Wisdom, talking about feminazis and their silly little shrill refusal to suck it down like men (or whatever protein-sessive boi’s fanboys gibber abuot when they get banned)?
I bet it was an ellipsis.
Arguing on the internet is like running … oh, never mind.
I liked the blowjob shitstorm, in it I tangentially learned that sex advice columnist Dan Savage was an Iraq War supporter. Something new every day.
Don’t worry Twisty, no matter how many mean things those people say about you, just keep in mind that they suck dick.
Thanks Twisty. This blowjob “thing” has been the funniest across blog “thing” I have read in a long long time. Laughing,, spewing brew, and dribbling in my pants has been a visceral delight in some inverted, reversed humourous way.
And I missed it, because I was out of town. Dang.
Due to my super-massive hacking skilz, I managed to unearth Twisty’s banninated post. Although somewhat pixilated due to her assistant’s advanced data-shredding skills, I was able to reconstruct it, and it goes something like this:
That was like the best blog shitstorm ever about blowjobs… i bet the BDSM crowd are gonna like spew when they figure out that bonobos like cunnilingus but only the self-loathing ones like fellatio. Fucktards. Seriously: Best. Post. Evar.
I have to admit that, even though it’s really funny, it’s still very sad how stridently women and men cling to their power relationships. And it’s really sad that sex is so sensational when it is absolutely nothing but a faint desire fetishized into obsessive importance.
It did take my mind off of the medical trials to come, though. I don’t like to think about that. It’s getting harder to ignore the sound of my heart slowly cracking in my chest when I think of you under the knife.
I have to admit that, even though it’s really funny, it’s still very sad how stridently women and men cling to their power relationships. And it’s really sad that sex is so sensational when it is absolutely nothing but a faint desire fetishized into obsessive importance.
I posit that no one, since the dawn of the patriarchal co-option of human sexuality, has ever actually enjoyed sucking up.
Has everyone gotten tired of the storm now?
*crickets*
MandosX3,
We have moved on to blowing corn dogs.
Actually, I cricketed in response to the fact that even the shrimp corn dogs post was kind of dead. Then Twisty came through.