You have hit the nail on the head with your elucidating remarks on envy.

Somewhat tangentially, my family has always judged character in terms of not just body fat, but physical fitness. I am seen to possess real flaws because my resting heart rate is around 70, whereas my sister Tidy’s is a superhuman 42. When I talked to my father the day after my ankle surgery, his first question was “So how are you exercising?” When I explained to him that my off-the-scale post-op pain required me to lie around with my leg elevated, his bright suggestion was that I lift weights.

Regarding envy, someone much more erudite and clever than I once postulated that the idea of “thin envy” is not unlike the idea of “penis envy.” Just as women probably never wanted to posess an actual penis but rather wanted to have the autonomy, agency, freedom, respect and social acceptance experienced by the segment of the population in posession of one, envy of thinner women isn’t about their bodies themselves, but rather the envy of the acceptance, social status, freedom and respect that we believe having a thin body confers. It’s not so much about what’s real as the qualities that our culture has assigned to different body types. Even though my sister and I grew up eating the same foods, I was led to believe by my family and the outside world that she somehow possessed a stronger character because she was thin and I was fat.

Cultural ideals of extreme thinness are about fetishizing women’s suffering, along with high heels and uncomfortable clothing. The ideal woman in this paradigm is one who willingly submits and suffers.

Of course not. My point is that, in a system where dominance rules, harrassment for lack of conformity becomes a socially acceptable response. This is the reality within a patriarchy, an ideology with which I take, you know, issue.