Modern communication? It’s a goner, dude. Spammers have broken email, ClearChannel has killed radio, and now politicians and their pundit buttboys have hammered the final nail in discourse’s coffin by destroying words themselves. Their method is simple. They take a word or phrase that everybody feels good about, or that has meant one thing for centuries — say, “freedom” — then they decide that it now means something they like better, say, “white Christian men own the world’s uteruses.” Their marketing department turns “freedom” into a brand, then redistributes it as the entirely new concept, thus completely neutralizing its value and effectively turning speech, oratory, and even casual conversation over a couple of tacos into nothing more than insipid puffs of sweaty, hypocritical air gasping from vulgar, thoughtless lips. In other words, words mean nothing. And usually that nothing can be relied upon to be creepy.
You know what I mean. You’ve heard’em. War is peace, freedom is war, defeat is victory, war is sexy, war is noble, prostitution is speech, women are sexy, women are empowerful, W is God, crunchy is a flavor, etc. And now — get ready — contraceptives are “demeaning to women.”
Let me translate. “Demeaning to women” now means “good for women” except when a man-hating feminist posing as a stripper says it, in which case it means “I am shrill, hairy, and ugly.”
I allude to the departure to Bizarro World of the phrase “demeaning to women” because Salon’s Tim Grieve reports that WaPo reports that W intends to appoint a misogynist godbag to the Department of Health and Human Services. The misogynist godbag’s resume includes an OB/BYN practice (my scientifically-conducted psychological profile on men — godbags or no — who yank out uteruses for a living can be found in the archives) and a stretch at a A Woman’s Concern, a Christian “pregnancy counseling” outfit. A Woman’s Concern’s mantra is that “distribution of contraceptives is ‘demeaning to women’.”
I reiterate that this godbag jagoff, Eric Keroack, will pretty much be in charge of programs that ostensibly purport to concern themselves with the reproductive issues of the poor.
“Christian pregnancy counseling” by the way, is another meaningless phrase that now means “Please accept this bouquet of roses, Your Royal Highness.” There are some of us left alive who remember when it meant “You’re havin’ that baby, bitch.”
This whole post means “My, isn’t the weather fine! Shall we lunch on the terrace, AndrÃ©?”