By the way, you can’t “do what you want despite patriarchy.” Patriarchy declines to offer you full agency, even if — particularly if — you try to take it. That’s why patriarchy is bad.

I see. So just give up. Don’t do what you want. Don’t challenge the patriarchy, just complain about it on a blog. Great idea. That sure is feminist of you.

What I and others are concerned with is this promoting of “sex-positivity” at the expense of actual feminism: the idea that all feminists (and, really, all women) must declare themselves “sex-positive,” by which they mean pro-sex industry, or be shamed as sex-hating Victorians. I am also concerned with the idea that having an orgasm and enjoying sex is in and of itself a feminist act, which some sex-poz types get very close to arguing.

Indeed. I think Holly is attacking a strawfeminist, definitely. I didn’t see anyone suggest that she doesn’t really like sex.

Personally I don’t want to get naked for someone who doesn’t respect me. If you think the proper thing to do is to get naked and then say “I’m naked! Respect me anyway!”…well, tough, I’m not doing that.

I think you’re confusing having the choice to do something, and having the right to be respected if you do it, with that choice being a feminist act.

I think getting naked is politically neutral. It can be patriarchal. It can be feminist. Like all things, it depends on context.

What I and others are concerned with is this promoting of “sex-positivity” at the expense of actual feminism: the idea that all feminists (and, really, all women) must declare themselves “sex-positive,” by which they mean pro-sex industry, or be shamed as sex-hating Victorians. I am also concerned with the idea that having an orgasm and enjoying sex is in and of itself a feminist act, which some sex-poz types get very close to arguing. And I’m concerned with the fact that any criticism of sex in pop culture from a feminist will, again, lead to accusations about being “anti-sex” or what-have-you. I have been in many conversations in which saying anything about strippers beyond “It’s their CHOICE and my best friend the stripper says she finds it empowering! Good for them!” will get you labeled a puritan or (gasp!) a Dworkinite.