Nov 07 2008


Somebody pinch me! I’m typing this from a bucket truck next to the 40-foot tower this guy Rick had to bury in 5 feet of cement next to my house, to which tower he then attached some kind of radio, to which radio I then attached my laptop. It’s been over 2 months in the making, but I think I now have an internet connection at El Rancho Deluxe.

I didn’t think I’d miss the internet all that much, but that prediction has proven to be inaccurate. It turns out I need the internet to live. For the past week, for example, they’ve had to lock me in a darkened room, in restraints, and with an IV drip of room temperature Cool Whip, to keep me from clawing my own eyes out. I only just found out today that Obama won the election.

Well, that’s all behind me now. Let the healing begin.


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  1. Mayya

    So glad you’re back!

  2. MNObserver

    Welcome back from the wilderness, Spinster Aunt and all of America.

  3. Laura

    Hooray!!! I was awaiting your return to this new, slightly less awful world.

  4. panoptical

    Yay! You’re back! Praise be to the Internet!

  5. TP

    Hello, Twisty! Wish you were here. Having a huge party for my 50th birthday. I hope your connection is fast and invigorating. Five feet of concrete! Good god!

    Let’s hope Obama isn’t too consciously sexist. I know how hard it is to even try to get rid of it. With two daughters and an amazing wife, I can hope that it’s on his radar at least.

  6. Lar

    YAY! Twisty, you’re back! We missed you so much!

  7. brainiac9

    Hooray! The internet is a better place now that you’re back. :D

  8. Karen

    Hooray! The Twisty drought is over!

  9. Samantha

    Glad you’re back. I was starting to feel like a stalker.

  10. EMP

    YAYY. Been checking in everyday as part of my lunch routine at work. Been deprived of proper blaming. Happy yr back.

  11. andrea

    I am a very longtime lurker, but fuck yeah. I am so glad you’re back. You’ve been gone so long that I never had the pleasure to hear your take on Ms. Palin! I hope you do share, eventually!

  12. lawbitch

    Praise the ceiling cat! Welcome back!

  13. Squiggy

    Twisty! I had no idea that you moved to Wilderness Absolute! Shocking!
    So happy you are cyber hooked up. Now the Obama win feels complete.

  14. witchy-woo

    It’s good news week, obviously.
    But poo to Obama – Twisty’s back!

  15. slythwolf

    I went without internet for a year once. Don’t know how I survived.

    Welcome back, Twisty.

  16. Medstudent

    Twisty, you’re back!

    Hallefuckinglooyah, indeed. =) Missed you!

  17. Vibrating Liz

    A day without Twisty is like a day without a cerebral cortex. Seven WEEKS without Twisty was like being trapped in an elevator with Rush Limbaugh, Kenny G, and a bushel of durians for all eternity.

    Sheesh. Let the healing begin, indeed.

  18. Vera

    You think it was painful for you? The rest of us had to survive the worst weeks of the presidential election without a Twisty fix.

  19. slade

    I check every day to see if Twisty is back…so tonight, after having a most horrid day dealing with some of the most stupid beings in the world (they’re all in Ohio), I said to myself as I clicked on IBTP, ‘If I don’t get to read something from Twisty, I’m going to fucking scream and awake my stupid neighbors.

    So glad you’re back. Wow…it takes that much to get internet in the woods/country? How about a satellite system? I have to get away from stupid people before I do something I regret.

    I want to live in the woods with feminist animals.

    I couldn’t live w/o the internet…only contact with brains.

    Yes, Liz, maybe now I can heal.

  20. cafesiren

    Yee-haw! Welcome back!

    Hey! Didja hear that now that we’ve elected Obama and by so doing ended all racism, patriarchy is going to be next to be abolished by fiat?

    No? Damn. I swear I thought that was how it was gonna work. Okay, well in that case, I’m glad you’re back, Twisty. Missed you.

  21. schmutzie

    Glory be!

  22. sonia


    I have the “AWOL” post imprinted on my brain from clicking once per day for the last few weeks. stalker, yeah.

  23. PhysioProf

    You got your own forty-foot motherfucking tower!?!? That kicks total fucking ass!!

  24. incognotter

    Welcome back, Twisty. I guess you did it with more flare than us non-wilderness folks who “borrow” a neighbor’s unsecured connection. How do you decorate a 40 foot radio tower? Is it powerful enough to cook you dinner? I sense a myth in the making.

  25. Orange

    Yo, frequently-clicking stalkers—if you subscribe to the RSS feed, you’ll always know when there’s a new post. Then you can be the instantly-commenting-on-new-posts variety of stalker instead. It’s more efficient.

  26. FatWhiteMaleEngineerHumanist

    Welcome back!

    As you’ve heard, the democrats have been given another chance to get it right. Don’t hold your breath, but I suppose anything is possible.

    On the negative side, Californians passed Prop 8. Apparently it’s OK for gays to exist, just not to be happily married. 18,000 couples are about to have their lives blasted apart as the neocons try to determine the most satisfying way of de-coupling them.


  27. Chris

    Welcome back!

  28. rootlesscosmo

    @Vibrating Liz: that’s the scariest simile I’ve ever seen. Twisty: welcome back, and maybe, you know, taper off on the cool whip–don’t try to go Cold Jello, ya dig?

  29. Dawn Coyote

    I think the internet missed you even more than you missed it.

    So happy to see you!

  30. Dawn Coyote

    So, so, so happy.

  31. Bird

    Praise Jebus! Twisty’s back!

  32. Otown

    It’s always good to hear that you’re still alive. IBTP was my first blog and my introduction to the land of radical feminism. It’s been a great ride so far. Party on, Twisty!

  33. Helen

    Goddammit woman, I missed you.

  34. Janna

    I can’t live without the internet either. The month last spring my hard drive was being fixed was the hardest month of my life. I can’t imagine lasting two.

    So, so glad you’re back.

  35. zen

    It was weird without you. Welcome back.

  36. madeleine

    Twisty, thank you for existing. Finding and reading your blog has helped me steer a straight course out of one of the most amazing fuckups of my life – and I’ve had some – and avoid another one.
    And thank you for resurfacing, I’ve missed missed missed you.

  37. speedbudget


  38. Woman

    Sup, sister. I thought Ike might have swallowed you.

    Remember Ike?

    *cricket noises*

  39. Jeanne

    Heya Twisty, so nice to see you back again. Don’t worry, the revolution is still not wearing bustiers and nail polish, as far as I can tell.

  40. zipper

    Delighted to have you back, Twisty. You have been sorely missed.

  41. Ron Sullivan

    Well helLO here! Wow, living somewhere so far out that you won’t get the news unless you want to sounds like paradise. Except for Tuesday night. Tuesday night, there were hoots and ya-hoos and music and corks popping and the occasional firecracker all over Berkeley, and I was dancing on the street in my stocking feet and relaying news from Joe at the TV to next-door neighbors on their upstairs porches who were hollering into cellphones and relaying news back to us. The only time lately I’ve been glad to live in a city.

    Next morning, of course, I was looking covertly over my shoulder at the churchgoing segment of same neighbors and wondering who had voted for Prop H8.

    But we dodged a bullet. Still breathing. Onward!

  42. Cathy

    SO glad you’re back and well. All that awoliness was getting me worried. El Rancho Deluxe sounds like the middle of nowhere. One more reason to envy you. I look forward to seeing some photos or video of the flora and fauna.

    Obama may not have women on his priorities list, but because he wants to help those less fortunate, he will be helping women. Maybe his daughters can educate him further; he’s definitely educable.

    Thanks to all the blamers for the interesting comments and links during the famine.

  43. Pinko Punko

    The now active cursor on the Twistymatic 3000, broadcasting from Obstreperon, makes me happy.

  44. Lemur

    W00t! More Twisty goodness! Praise Ceiling Cat!

  45. Erzebeth

    Yay! Finally! Welcome back, Twisty – so glad you’re OK!

  46. Yeny

    So happy you are back!

  47. Rikibeth

    Welcome back, Twisty!

  48. Zooeyibz

    Praise be! Welcome back. I was getting worryingly near the end of the Hall of Blame and selfishly concerned that my blaming faculties would weaken without a regular infusion of Twisty-ness.

    Thanks for being here.

  49. Ayla

    I find myself intensely interested in this “El Rancho Deluxe” you speak of…

  50. CJ

    Twisty –

    So nice to see you back, blaming or not. :)

    Obamarama la la la, it’s all the same to me…




    Hey Twisty CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE what vast numbers of us check your blog every day JUST IN CASE you were to come back to us?


  52. Mooska

    Praise be! Welcome back, Twisty. You’ve been missed a lot.

  53. weeza

    You know, that would have been an excellent opportunity to learn to knit ;). Glad you’re back!

  54. Chris Clarke

    *waves at Twisty*

  55. Angmar Bucket

    “Let’s hope Obama isn’t too consciously sexist. I know how hard it is to even try to get rid of it. With two daughters and an amazing wife, I can hope that it’s on his radar at least.”

    From what I’ve heard of Obama, he has the struggle of women in mind. I wouldn’t call him a feminist, but I did hear on the television about him turning down some politician for some position because said politician didn’t adhere enough to the realities that non-whites and women face when it comes to opportunities. It was very reassuring.

  56. buggle

    Hey Twisty, glad you are back :) Also glad I’m not the only nerdy-pants who checks here all the time to see if you’ve written anything new.

  57. Janet

    You have been so missed! Welcome back! :-)

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