You thought I’d forgotten all about the new “Hugs, Twisty” feature, but you’re wrong-o! Todays topics are: what to do about rapists, the state-owned uterus, and grammar. Let’s get started!
Long-time listener, first-time caller. For serious though, I want your help, and the help of the rest of the blamers, if you think the question’s worth the time and energy.
I feel I’m a pretty advanced user, feminism-wise, and I still can’t quite figure out when or whether it’s my responsibility to out a rapist.
Perhaps you would be willing to read my tale of woe and tell me what you think? It’s here.
I’d better emphasize that, as a spinster aunt, I know almost everything, but I am not a rape counselor.
That said, I can’t read your site (it appears to be password protected) but if somebody raped you, you need to call a rape crisis center pronto, and go get checked out for STDs and possible injury. You should also report it.
If somebody raped a friend of yours, urge her to consider the above advice.
If you go to the police, you have to have evidence, and even then there is a likelihood that you will not be believed. Unfortunately, due to the bogus set-up where women are considered a priori to have given consent to male abuse — which is consistent with global accords governing fair use of women — rape is very difficult to prosecute. A majority of rape prosecutions end in dismissal or acquittal. A quarter of convicted rapists never see a minute of jail time.
If, by “outing” him, you mean telling everyone you know that a mutual acquaintance is a rapist: in general this gambit is advisable only if your safety or the safety of others is not at risk. It is possible (even probable) that you will not be believed, because nobody wants to admit the possibility that someone in their social circle is a rapist. You may be thought to have invented the whole thing out of nefarious, lying-bitch motives. He and his friends may seek retribution.
This is the crux of patriarchy. Control of women through fear of violence.
Shakesville has an interesting piece up on the subject of who is and who isn’t a rapist.
P.S. When you wrote to me your shift-key was broken, but take heart! I have addressed the resulting capitalization errors for you, free of charge. Maybe you ought to get that keyboard fixed!
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Approximately twelve seconds after reading the first installment of “Hugs, Twisty”, I sauntered over to Pharyngula, where I saw this.
I think PZ hits it on the head when he writes, “It’s nice to know that the Catholic Church’s criteria for the value of a woman’s life focus on the functionality of her ovaries rather than the existence of her mind.” I just heard a popping sound and caught a whiff of ozone, which can only mean I’ve blown out my obstreperal lobe. I am, at this very moment, searching in vain on Amazon for a replacement.
I have not bloviated on the subject of the “Italian Terri Schiavo” because I suffered a similarly blown lobe. And besides, by the time I’d heard about it, all the relevant points had been made and all the good jokes taken. Quoth PZ: “Here’s a good rule: never consult the priesthood of a death cult before making a life-and-death decision.” Sound advice.
However, Berlusconi’s notion that Eluana Englaro, brain-dead for 17 years, is “in the condition to have babies” is consistent with global accords governing the fair use of women. He’s so refreshingly honest! Here in the States women imagine that we own our own uteruses, and don’t realize that we are kept in line with the perpetual threat that Roe will be overturned at any second.
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Your new HT feature is really great! You continue to deliver the goods.
However, in view of the below, I must ask you that question all-too-frequently asked of us feminists: are you sure you aren’t part of the problem rather than the solution?
Boston, MA (who occasionally commented under Dawn O’Day – and who is very glad yer vegan)
[Hillary includes in its entirety an article from MSNBC on grammar and spelling snobs who are "pushed over the edge" by the recession, making them more pedantic than ever before! I include the link and a few relevant quotations in advance of my response -- Twisty]
[W]hile blunders and bloopers have ever exasperated the spelling snobs and grammar grunions of the world, our recent woes — housing foreclosures, massive layoffs, rising debt and war — may be ratcheting up the pressure some feel to seize control of something (anything!), even if it’s just a properly placed comma.
“Hanging on to some kind of rule might be comforting to people,” says Bethany Keeley, a grad student from Athens, Ga., who runs The “Blog” of “Unnecessary” Quotation Marks. “People are looking for something they can control and ‘What should we do about our foreign policy?’ is a lot more complicated a question than ‘Should the period go inside or outside the quotation mark?’ “
“In general, I think people are getting a little bit meaner about correcting others or sharing what they call their ‘observations,’ ” [someone] says. “They’re uptight and stressed out about losing their jobs. And if it makes them feel better to tell me I have a string hanging off my skirt or I used the word ‘your’ when I really meant to use the word ‘you’re,’ then fine.”
“He carried five pens in his pocket at all times and would edit his morning paper at the breakfast table,” Kenton says. “My worst embarrassment was when he corrected someone’s bumper sticker in a public parking lot with passers-by staring.”
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P.S. In a subsequent communiqué, Hillary says she looked up “grunion” and found the only definition was a sort of fish. My own independent research confirms it! A grunion is a Californian smelt the chief humancentric attribute of which is that it can be caught by hand on dry land when it scuttles up on the beach to spawn. I’m not sure what you’re supposed to do with it after you catch it. Grunion taco? The grunion’s relationship to English grammar remains unclear.