Conscious femininity is women placing their value along the male gaze; fighting for the patriarchy while saying ‘I’m still pretty and fuckable.’ When this is seen, men have the power to ask ‘how?’ and women don’t. Men then get to create standards and patriarchy happily provides that information for us. Being feminine, basing your life appearance and character around what makes men want you as an orifice is doomed failure. First men allocate a shelf- life to your ‘usefulness’, no matter how feminine; and second, it’s giving oppressers the bar to still set standards for us. Raging for feminist victory while looking over your shoulder back at what men want you to be is handing any desired control over immediately.

True hetero feminist victory is dependent on finding what a female truly is – a human that doesn’t conform to trying to be like the oppressers or the oppressed. Creates a character that isn’t limited to her being young and beautiful – so that she feels she has the same worth at 20 as she does at 70. She’s the one who picks a man, who chooses her because she’s a person over a ‘female’. Het feminist victory is females being valued and setting standards, male opinion being trivial to them. When male opinion on how we should be is unimportant, that’s when we have success, regardless of what we stop for a brief moment to let men do to us.

Bottom line: being female shouldn’t be the important thing, for het or homosexual women. Being a woman over a man should be the very last thing you consider about yourself, as should whether you desire PIV sex or not. I’m not gay (FYI) but I let my behaviour flow more than most het/ hom women, like an autistic/ schizophrenic woman who loses all sense of things of how she should be in society. Maybe those are the freest.

Bluey, maybe there’s no problem with wanting PIV sex, as long as you try hard to not let that sex define you. Arguing about feeling excluded liking PIV sex suggests you make it a greater part of your life and character than it should be. I too like PIV sex but I don’t let it define me and thus anger me.

A lot of animals seem to reproduce without a patriarchy. Sex isn’t culture inscripted, it’s a part of life they don’t even think about. While animal cartoonists give animal females pink bows and painted nails, gender is no issue because reproductive sex is no issue. (Sorry to bring evopsych into it!).

I’m just not sure we can end patriarchy’s dominance while still engaging in activities that are the lynchpin of the system.

This is why I advocate the Femininity Work Stoppage. I’m not 100% sure it would work, but hell, it couldn’t make it any WORSE.

It is possible to be celibate if one doesn’t find a partner capable of participating in a healthy relationship – straight or lesbian. Persevering in a bad relationship of any form is akin to slow suicide and that is the state of most couples today.

This.

I’m about to buy my first house, and I’m dead terrified of something weird happening with my job and not being able to make the mortgage payments. If anyone wants to come live in a celibate commune with a neurotic Brussels Griffon and a clawfoot tub, I’m accepting applications.

Heterosexuality is not an abnormal state. Finding a decent partner in order to practice heterosexuality is abnormally difficult. That’s also true in gay and lesbian relationships.
The system churns out a lot of jerks through cognitive and behavioral programming which offers tangible and/or intangible rewards for identifying with, if not belonging to, the patriarchy.
Money and sainthood, for instance.

When you have the physical and fiscal power to get away with being egregiously wrong, it is tempting to get rid of all the associated characteristics of the wrong-doers. But heterosexuality is pretty much here to stay, even if it is fashionable to deny it and most practitioners will lead very lonely lives. Women will never enjoy that state until more men are raised, against the odds, to realize that a key isn’t superior to a lock just because it’s pointy.

The P advertises feminism as the sole province of lesbians, to keep het women from jumping into the fray. It’s called, ‘Divide and Conquer’ and it works really well for them.

1. Loved the poem!

2. We have shed blood in the effort to remove government from our bedrooms. Let’s not denigrate the value of that effort (still in process) by deciding certain citizens are more or less worthy of shaping their society based upon sexual preference.

3. If you feel you are ineffectual as a woman in participating in the habilitation of society because you are heterosexual, why bother blaming or complaining at all? Give it up. Send Nigel back to his mother if she’ll have him. Mothers ought to give up their sons if they, through some awful prank of nature, happen to be heterosexual. Anyone they would choose to partner would automatically be harmful to every woman females on the planet.

Women don’t think with their vaginas. We are, in fact, capable of rational thought after engaging in sexual congress with the enlightened males of Planet Earth.

Both of them.

*cough cough*

Looking out on the morning rain
I used to feel so uninspired
And when I knew I had to face another day
Lard, it made me feel so tired.

I didn’t know just what was wrong with society
Till you came along to name it.
You put your rubber boot squarely up the P,
And you helped me blame it.
Now I’m no longer doubtful of what I’m living for,
Cos if I can screw the Patriarchy I don’t need no more.

Cos you make me feel
You make me feel etc
Like a natural Blamer

Happy 50th Twisty, and thanks!