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May 29 2009

Pay no attention to that ghost writer behind the curtain

Holy shit. I come back from a simple blown lobe, and what the hell. I observe that that grubby stinkpot Jill has gotten above herself, flyin too close to the sun an’ that. It is of paramount importance that you disregard anything she says. She’s unhinged. Teams of experts have confirmed it. I mean, she’s all right for a ghost writer, but I wouldn’t want to spend the winter with her. You probably know she wasn’t my first choice. I wanted Molly Ivins.

29 comments

  1. Larkspur

    Oh, whatever. I like that grubby stinkpot Jill.

    Everybody’s always asking both of you for something, so I’m asking this (and don’t think I think either of you owes me anything, okay?): how’s Maypearl & Friends?

  2. Kauri

    OK, now *really* loving this. Are you perchance doing a PhD on online presence and identity? Are we your unwitting subjects?

  3. procrastinatrix

    *waves at Twisty*

    It is a dream of mine to meet either or both Jill and Twisty for beer and Tacos one day.

  4. MLH

    I am with procrastinatrix, it would be great to meet either or both, even if I have to go to Texas. And that’s saying a lot, ’cause except Austin, I quite dislike Texas.

  5. Feminist Avatar

    Multiple personality blogging- I could really get into this.

  6. Tata

    The thing is we met Jill when Jill’s father died. It was a brief meeting under difficult circumstances, but it made an impression. I’d just lost my father. Similar dealio.

    Further: tacos, please. It’s been awhile since we saw gorgeous lunches. Did I mention tacos?

  7. Lizard

    This blog has always felt somewhat thought-experiment-y. It’s also whipsmart and sometimes even funny as hell. I don’t read because I’m looking for the most rad radfem analysis online; I read because Twisty is some kind of awesome. I think Jill is, too. I wish both the best.

  8. Val

    Hopefully one thing we can ALL agree on is how much we-miss-us-some-Molly-Ivins!

  9. SargassoSea

    Who didn’t want Molly?

  10. frog princess

    For the last couple of days as all around us were discussing and disgorging and depilating, I’ve spared several thoughts for Bert and whether his skunk stink has completely faded yet. Larkspur’s post asking after Maypearl emboldened me to ask about Bert’s stinkiness, if he has any still.
    Don’t know why I have been thinking about it, apart from an idle curiosity on how long exactly it takes for the skunk stink to fade. What is the half-life of skunk stink? Did you find a way to minimize the odor?
    If there is no effective method for eliminating a skunky stink on dogs, when chemists have provided so many various ways to remove or cover the stink of mere living from our persons, ibtp.

  11. birkwearingblamer

    I loved Molly.

    Your online radfem persona reminds me of Jane Austin. When Jane died, her nephew took over her writings and image. He made Jane’s image into a prig spinster. Jane’s nephew even went so far as to destroy personal letters written by Jane to promote this uptight image. I’ll bet that there was all kinds of catiness and off-color humor in those personal letters. I just know that Jane was a real person with whom I’d love to drink whiskey and laugh. No way that a woman who could write snarky social commentary like that was a pearl clutcher.

    You on-line persona is like Jane’s post-mortem image. Twisty is the proper radfem spinster aunt. Jill is the real person with whom I’d like to share margarita and tacos.

    That’s not confusing at all.

  12. Laima

    What Lizard said.

    I don’t expect to get out to Texas, well, ever, but if I did, sharing tacos with Twisty or Jill would be awesome.

  13. Human Bean

    Oi, the costs of fame and leadership in a movement that decries both.

    We humans are funny little beans, aren’t we?

  14. OVERLADY

    I met Twisty/Jill once, and alls I did was GUSH over her for like a half an hour, leading (later in the day) to Chris Farley-esque head beating and the decrying of “STU-pid STU-pid STU-pid!!!!”

  15. Jonathan

    Did you get an autograph, Overlady?

    Seriously, did you. Is Twisty/Jill doing autographs? If so, which name does she sign?

  16. Cara

    Oh, I dunno. I think she did a pretty good job.

    Hope your lobe is feeling better.

  17. Remora

    Glad you’re both still on the island.

  18. Jodie

    Dang! Tacos and margaritas and Twisty and Jill! Sigh — instead, I have to work this weekend.

  19. tara

    Glad your lobe is intact again (for now).

    I would totally join your cult by the way. Cuntalina kool-aid and all.

  20. asdf

    The whole cult of personality aspect of IBTP has always seemed creepy to me. I’ve been avoiding saying that for years now. What a relief to express that at long last.

  21. thebewilderness

    Criminy! I think maybe you need to reopen the forum and give the commentariat a place to sort out the possibilities, and come to consensus, on the correct derogatory terms to apply to women.
    That has to be pretty high up on the feminist to-do list.

    Scares the bejeepers out of the orcs though,I bet.

  22. thebewilderness

    The flame war, I mean, scares the orcs, not the other bit.

  23. gowbster

    Its awkward now that I know twisty isnt real…

  24. MariaS

    Ha, I was thinking the very title of this post late last night! Welcome back!

  25. iam legs (nee Angela)

    @gowbster: Anything that broadens knowledge of who you’re communicating with broadens communication.
    Also, what Lizard said: I’m certainly here for the particular kind of awesome that Twisty is, including the language served hot and fresh, and the surgical precision with which she removes eye-scales.

    What Human Bean said, too. Maybe we could reconsider what we think of as leadership roles.
    In one of her autobiographical stories Ursula K. LeGuin talks about when white guys met the original Native Californians and found that in the village there was a person who said: “Hey, you know what, it’s time to go gather sorghum now (or whatever) so let’s everybody do that!” That person was basically the alarm clock for the village, to remind and gather people for a task. The white guys couldn’t relate to that, so they decided this vocal person was the chief. But you know, that wasn’t the case.
    The point of a leaderless group isn’t that there is no leader, it’s that everybody takes on some aspect of leadership. So in my mind Twisty’s kind of the wakeup call person / recreation director / point out which way we should think about going person.
    You know, now the discussion I want to have is, “What is my/your role in leading this movement?” This may not be the right place for it.

  26. alphabitch

    Honestly? I’m glad to know that Twisty isn’t real; unrequited love has always been my favorite. Esp. when there’s no chance whatsoever at requition. Or whatever you call that.

    But Bert’s real, right? And the skunk? I too have been idly wondering how that’s going. We had a skunk go off in the creek behind the house, but Ruby was unable to make contact. It’s only a little stinky back there still.

  27. Susan

    Molly Ivins wrote a book called “Bushwhacked.” I’ll bet she would have appreciated both Twisty *and* “cuntilina.” You are more awesome than ever to me.

  28. littlesister

    I thought everyone knew from the start ‘twisty’ wasn’t real? It was written on the “About Twisty” page ages ago when I first started blaming, the statement that Twisty Faster is a made up character.
    But clearly the writer IS twisty, Jill is Twisty and Twisty is Jill. The only difference is Twisty has jaundiced eyes and comes from another planet. oh, and is perfect. Jill is like me and let’s gendered slurs slip occasionally, on account of not being immune to the P.
    also OMG ever since Jill made Twisty say cuntalina I have been dropping the C bomb CONSTANTLY! haha, i am a little sister and thus prone to mimicking anyone i look up to i suppose…
    And I have to say i feel really odd….disrespectful even, calling Twisty by her ‘real name’. I’m sticking with Twisty.
    If I ever succeed in my mission to stalk and meet my favourite feminist writer, i will be calling her twisty!

  29. Vinaigrette Girl

    Twisty Jill isn’t Real? Great pots of lard I am so surprised and disappointed. I thought everyone on the Teh Netz was 100% as I interpreted, and leadership foisted on someone by my own brain was automatically accepted by my nominee. No? Who knew?

    I think there is a time when ‘cuntalina’ is applicable, and frankly, if Twisty lets me into her virtual living room, it’s her house and she can say what she likes in it, and if I don’t like it I am free to leave. All this “calling her out” crapola makes me want to wash my mouth out; pheee ooooo ey. T’chah. Sanctimoniousness isn’t a public good.

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