When a wolf spider the size of Guam strolls by, encrusted with, literally, a buttload of teensy wolf spiders, it is understandable if you widen the eyes a little and say something along the lines of “whoa!” or “what tha?” Nobody will think the less of you.
October is among the spideriest of months. Ghostly white crab spiders hide in the sunflowers, green-headed jumping spiders spring out from the wood piles, and giant Neocsonae cover all the windows and doorways in the bunkhouse with cobwebs, eventually enveloping the entire structure, imprisoning the unsuspecting inhabitants for later use as a food source over the winter. If you haven’t seen the dog lately, check the Neoscona web.
I was watching the horror movie channel the other day and there was a scene where a dangling tarantula lowered itself down a thread onto a screaming girl. I laughed and laughed. Tarantulas burrow in the ground, they don’t dangle on screaming girls. That director. What a stupe.
Screaming girls are one of the four cornerstones of modern (and oldern) television. The other three cornerstones are ice girls, prostituted girls, pregnant girls, violated girls, and dead girls.