Feb 26 2011

Announcement Korner

Red swamp crawfish

For the heartwarming nature crappists, I present the red swamp crawfish found beached at my low-water crossing the other day. No yella labs were injured during this photo shoot. Brief thoughts of étouffée, the ancestral diet of spinster aunts of yore.

Fran and red swamp crawfish

Meanwhile, there can never be a proper bloggy dustup without a mea culpa from me, and this one is no exception.

About an hour ago I started reading the comments to yesterday’s postette. Upon discovering that these were largely a perpetuation of the creepiness from the “Translucent” post commentary — despite the fact that I had expressed my disinterest in continuing this “discussion” — I blew another lobe. Whereupon I embarked on a deletion rampage. I slashed out innumerable remarks generated by the 3 or 4 commenters who had apparently mistaken I Blame the Patriarchy for their own personal blog. But something went awry, and I ended up deleting some comments that had nothing to do with that-which-we-shall-not-name. I’m sorry about that; it was a mistake, and if your remarks were among the collateral damage, I promise, it’s nothing personal.

To those of you who are inconvenienced by my sporadic attention to the moderation queue: you’re just going to have to suck it up. I am on hiatus. Hiatus means “your comment may not see the light of day for days, weeks, or ever.” I realize that you may consider this to be sub-par customer service, but remember: you always get what you pay for here at I Blame the Patriarchy!

To those of you who are considering leaving a comment on this post that has anything to do with the trans “debate”: if you do I will ban you forever.

Finally, to clarify the new-and-improved gender-identity-related commenting policy:

This blog endeavors to cultivate dude-free discourse. Therefore, any comment that expresses views proceeding from any discernible male-identified perspective, even if it is superficially pro-feminist, is not suitable for posting here.

Carry on.


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  1. Jill

    Ahhh. That’s better.

  2. Pinko Punko

    I saw something like that walking down the sidewalk and had a flight of fancy of Pug man sniffing it and coming away with a painful snout attachment, but the boys took no notice because it must not have smelled like poop or moved quite fast enough or look like a cheez-it. Funny thing is I at first thought “WHAT THE F!? A MINIATURE LOBSTER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SIDEWALK??” Then I reduced the case of my thinking to a more polite “eureka, methinks it is a crawfish.”

  3. Shinila

    Haha Jill you rock! Dude- free discourse – Yayyyyy. Loving the dog but don’t know about the insects.

  4. tinfoil hattie

    This is the best blog IN THE WORLD, and that is a beautiful photo. Whatta crayfish.

    Thanks for interrupting your hiatus. I’m sorry for the conditions under which you had to do so.

  5. Solveig

    Hurry up with that Hiatus, would’ja? I enjoy your blogs. Your lab is nice-looking, of course, and being a dog-lover myself I can’t ever complain about canine interest stories. But it would ALSO be nice to hear what you have to say about the insanity-inducing Christian extremists currently dominating discussion in the U.S. House of Representatives, or the even wackier and in many ways more terrifying State legislators. Or whatever the heck you feel like writing about. It’s always good.

  6. Yardshark

    Love that crayfish! So pretty and so lobstery, and…so…edible….

    Wish you could send him out to nip the taint of every dude that dares to consider his smarmy opinion worthy around here.

  7. Yardshark

    Yah Solveig.

    And ya know what is crazymaking? All the freedom-fighter blogs, op-eds and liberal output about dystopian pro-rich teabagger moves and the international uprisings-for-democracy that include NARY A WHISPER about the attacks on the rights of American women!!

  8. Comrade PhysioProf

    That crayfish lookes fucken tastee!

  9. Laughingrat

    That is one uppity crawdad. Harness that rage and the Patriarchy would topple in a heartbeat.

  10. redpeachmoon

    Thanks for calling the creepiness the creepiness. And for the breath of fresh air that your finally brought to your blog. You were missed. Please don’t go far!

  11. Bushfire

    Yes! Yes! Yes!

  12. Friend of Snakes

    That is one handsome arthropod. A couple pounds more of his brethren and you’d have the makings of a nice etouffee.

    Thanks to your photo I discovered that: “Procambarus clarkii was introduced to Japan as a food source for bullfrogs, and is now a common family pet all over the main island.” http://animaldiversity.ummz.umich.edu/site/accounts/information/Procambarus_clarkii.html

  13. Friend of Snakes

    The info I quoted about P. clarkii in my previous comment should have begun with an ellipsis, but I was so fearful of ending up in the moderation queue that I omitted it. I blame the tos.

  14. Mortisha

    Awesome, we are back to nature crap. My favourite kind.

    Quote from a 17yr old girl in our horse riding club this week

    “My boyfriend and I just broke up after he asked me to choose between him and Sam. So obviously, I chose Sam. I told him right from the start, that if he ever makes me choose, Sam will win. He thought I was joking.”

    Horse owners out there, give your horse a hug, they help so many young girls stand up for themselves.

  15. tinfoil hattie

    I vote Jill takes as long a hiatus as she needs! There I go again, saying “I.”

  16. Hermionemone

    What a gorgeous crustacean! A true living jewel, right in Jill’s own back 40. Savage Death Island is indeed a magical place. One celebrates the existence of beautiful living beings that are such a delight to the eye, for evolution’s own inscrutable reasons, or for no reason at all other than that accidentally being beautiful does no harm.

  17. speedbudget

    It is beautiful, but I keep thinking of the wonderful plate of crawfish I had in Galveston. I can’t help it!

    And then my mind slips to various days and nights in New Orleans enjoying various po’ boys. I can’t help that either!

  18. Comrade Svilova

    The Godbags are encroaching ever more. Letter in my local paper quoted Hosea as evidence — evidence! — that fetuses are alive and fully human from conception on.

    Blaming and sighing.

  19. awhirlinlondon

    Great gulps of pure fresh air in one of the few and precious places in the world (cyber or otherwise) where it’s even possible. I second you, as often, tinfoil hattie, on both counts.

  20. ew_nc

    Using Fran’s head as a measuring tool, I’d say that is one big mud bug! About the same size as what you’d pay $25 for at Red Lobster.

  21. Jill

    I dunno. Fran’s something of a pinhead.

    By the way, just to be clear: I didn’t eat the crawdad. It swam away to become some cottonmouth’s amuse-bouche.

  22. Yeny

    Am I the only one that finds it really creepy that the main reaction to the picture of a living animal has been: ‘Yum. Want To Eat’?
    (And this is coming from someone who ocasionally eats fish and crustaceans)

    Which is not to say that a person can’t have that reaction, it’s just that on some level it reminds me of a man looking at a picture of a woman and thinking ‘I’d hit that’, and then proceeding to say it out loud for everyone to hear and congratulate them for their kinda gross thought.

  23. Yeny

    Gosh, rereading my comment (which is in moderation) I realise it may seem like I’m telling you what you can or can’t write on your own blog. That is not my intention at all! Your passing comment about etoufee didn’t even cross my mind. I just found it odd that there would be various replies to your post that soley had the function of expressing a desire to eat a living creature.

    Anyone that knows me can attest that I hero-worship you to the nth degree!

  24. Jill

    It is the crawfish’s misfortune to be considered a delicious morsel by epicureans the world over. The only time most people see them is when they’re on a plate; I can’t fault anyone for the Pavlovian drool reaction. Patriarchy, however, may be blamed for fostering a soul-sucking disconnect between humans and what they eat.

  25. Shopstewardess

    My first reaction to the picture (and I hope a “my” at the start doesn’t result in moderation) was how nice it is to see a lab with a decent waistline. My neighbour’s lab is sadly pudgy, which pains me every time I see the poor thing.

  26. Friend of Snakes

    “Am I the only one that finds it really creepy that the main reaction to the picture of a living animal has been: ‘Yum. Want To Eat’?”

    As that crawdad’s body posture next to the hulking mammal demonstrates, most unwanted, close-up, non-familial encounters in the wild provoke a “Yikes, I’m about to be eaten” reaction. So if it works in both directions, I don’t blame the patriarchy, I blame nature.

    And Jill, you know the critters in your section of heaven better than I, but most of my cottonmouth friends say, “Pitooey! I’m rarely that desperate. Leave it for the coons, or my cousins, the crayfish snakes.”

  27. Triste

    Ugh. Just ugh.

    For the record, I’d like to apologize to you and anyone else reading for my part in the 700 comment wanksplosion. There is indeed nothing in the entire known universe worse than a goddamn trans debate.

    In other news, holy shit, what the hell is that thing? Somehow growing up in the suburbs has always made me feel like anything that isn’t a squirrel/crow/robin/sparrow is some sort of weird alien shit that you’d find in the Amazon. That thing has fucking neon red on it, Jeeeeeez.

  28. Compcat

    Had a blue crawfish as a pet once. They make pretty cool pets, in addition to being edible. Mine liked to hang out in the aquarium plants (it’s a female crawfish thing) and chase the aquarium cleaning apparatuses. Highly entertaining. For a crawfish, anyway.

  29. Antoinette Niebieszczanski

    That crawfish is too pretty to eat.

  30. Cycles

    It’s weird, though, how fish and crustaceans evoke the “Yum, seafood” reaction, while pictures of, say, a bovine do not.

    I’ve often overheard such comments at big fish museums (like the Monterey Bay Aquarium), but never at a mammal museum (like a zoo).

    Perhaps it’s because humans tend to eat seafood that’s roughly the shape it was when alive: crab legs, lobster tails, whole fish, shrimp. Whereas we cut up other animals into relatively small parts that are unrecognizable outside of a butcher’s chart. So you can’t just announce you want to grab a hunk off the rump of that giant water buffalo behind the fence, while theoretically you could reach into a tank and slurp down one of the oysters on display.

    “it’s just that on some level it reminds me of a man looking at a picture of a woman and thinking ‘I’d hit that’, and then proceeding to say it out loud for everyone to hear and congratulate them for their kinda gross thought.”

    Yes, totally, this too. I’m glad you brought this up. These days you’re not allowed to tap on the glass of an aquarium tank to display your dominance over the caged beasties, so you have to resort to saying you would fuck it. I mean, eat it. Whatever, same diff.

  31. Jodie

    We used to lure those things out of their lairs with a bit of raw bacon. Then play with them and let them go…I didn’t realize people ate them until I was an adult.

  32. Ron Sullivan

    Mmmm, squeeze da head and suck da tail, or the other way around; I forget. Also: Japanese armor.

    We eat a lot of species, and build houses and make paper and clothes and cetera out of others and it complicates the hell out of our relationships with them. I have pet fish and I eat fish and I have pet turtles and a snake and it upsets the hell out of me to see people (of any species) eating or killing or running over turtles and snakes. Go figure.

    I kinda like crustaceans. Both ways.

  33. Ron Sullivan

    Also I like trees, similarly.

  34. Jezebella

    Ron: it’s squeeze da tail, suck da head.

    Not that I’ve ever done anything so gross, despite having grown up in South Louisiana. Just setting the record straight.

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