Apr 07 2011

Vulvular witticism of the week

Enya wafting from pants

“If you put your ear to my labia, you can hear the strains of Enya drifting out.”

Notorious Ph.D, describing the healing powers of her poontangal moonglow


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  1. tinfoil hattie

    I am so, so jealous. My labia sing nothing.

  2. Lovepug

    Mine know all the lyrics to every P.J. Harvey song.

    (Lawrd help me I’ll never be able to hear an Enya song again without hard to explain guffaws).

  3. AlienNumber

    My lanya brings all the New Age boys to the yard
    And they’re like
    It’s better, more natural, more unconsciously feminine than yours


  4. niki

    The Enya in my labia is saying ‘Go away, go away, go awaaaay….’

  5. MPMR

    Poontangal moonglow. Oh my dog.

    I feel like my poontang doesn’t even HAVE any moonglow. Is there some extra-feminine feminine hygiene product that can fix me? Number One Science Blog, help me!

  6. TotallyDorkin


    Yes there is an extra special feminine hygiene product that will add a pearlescent glow to your “downstairs business”. Side effects include nausea, headache, redness, swelling, vomiting, burning sensation, cancer, and death. Get yours at the local walmart! Disclaimer: No contraception available at any of the participating locations.

  7. j

    AlienNumber, you’re awesome. Please keep up the good commenting work.

  8. speedbudget

    My vulva plays Kittie.


  9. pheenobarbidoll

    Oh lord…I just thought of ipod docking stations. Would be pretty convenient.

  10. CLD

    Mine just makes smacking noises like flips flops on linoleum. Damn you, perimenopause!

  11. Antoinette Niebieszczanski

    My ovaries jangle melodiously, like distant sleighbells.

  12. tinfoil hattie

    CLD, in a year or so you could be sealed shut so tight from the drought “down there” that you’ll miss the flip-flop flappin’. Peri seems like a distant, pleasant dream to me now.

    (Don’t you just love the expression, “down there”? EVERYONE immediately knows what it means: It’s so nasty we can’t say vagina, or vulva; we have to say “down there.”)

  13. speedbudget

    Well, duh, tinfoil hattie. You can’t even say “uterus” in the house of a governing body cause it’s dirty! I can’t imagine trying to discus vulvular or vaginal thingies. Think of the children!

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