Category Archive: Bloodsport

That which pertains to butchery for the purpose of entertainment. Includes the advancement of a vegan ideology.

Dec 26 2011

Thus spake Debbie Downer

debbiedown

Though the life of a spinster aunt is mostly fluffy and carefree, there are certain unpleasant situations wherein the Auntly Directive explicitly calls for taking the wind out of people’s sails. Sail de-winding has gotten a bad rap, as it has been embraced as bloodsport over the years by various do-gooders and buttinskis. Remember “tough …

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Aug 24 2011

Ditwuss Award de la semaine: PETA

By now — since it is my custom to lollygag, dawdle, and often even dilly-dally until steamy breaking news has developed an unappealing crust on top before I set about wrinkling my lip at it — you have already heard of and perhaps even forgotten all about the irritating information that PETA intends to launch …

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Jul 28 2011

What fresh old hell is this?

I thought I’d heard it all when it comes to the fine tradition of loving mothers forced by sicko patriarchal culture to inflict unspeakable sex-related tortures on their daughters for their own good, but I was wrong. I most regretfully bring you breast ironing. When I saw the headline “Breast ironing tradition in Cameroon” I …

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May 01 2011

Obscene British patriarchy-fest inspires a few auntly words on weddings

Royal broodmare in shuttlecock burqa

Marriage is the ultimate expression of compliance with the culture of oppression. It is the bedrock of misogyny, the ideal upon which heteronormativity is based, the primary unit with which patriarchy replicates itself. Thus does the spinster aunt die a little inside whenever one of her friends or acquaintances makes with the big announcement that …

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Jul 02 2010

LA Times publishes article about woman; global reserves of sexist stereotypes dangerously depleted

In the news: a woman known as Anna Chapman is accused of being some sort of Russian spy (Russian spy? Seriously? I didn’t realize we still had those. It’s comforting to know that at least some beloved artifacts from my idyllic Cold War childhood endure). This LA Times story, the gist of which is gripping …

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Jun 09 2010

Citizens of the Poconos, unite against slutty teen rape victims!

It’s heartwarming, our pretty society’s outpouring of love for little girls. Behold the sugarplum fairytale of this 13-year old Pennsylvania girl: According to a marginally informative article in the Lehigh Valley Morning Call, Douchebag Supreme Michael J Lisk raped the girl repeatedly for over a year, made her pregnant, then furtively buried the fetus after …

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Jan 24 2010

Rednecks vs hogs

Do you often say to yourself, “I wonder, what does a feral hog track look like, anyway?” Look no further. Behold the goods. This track was huge enough that I have no wish to encounter the hog what made it. It probably has giant venomous fangs, spiked tail, and 6-inch claws. Texas has more feral …

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Jan 06 2010

Spinster aunt speaks out agin crapulent sickos in horse industry

horse-starved

Still from a YouTube vid exposing unspeakable sickosity at New Jersey Bravo Packing company. Disturbing in the extreme. Spinster aunts are multi-faceted — which is fortunate, because otherwise our Down With Patriarchy! ways would render us friendless and alone — and one of those facets is that we have been horse-crazy since birth. Horse people …

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Dec 03 2009

Spinster aunt explains comedy

Whenever I hear some guy say that feminists don’t have a sense of humor, I want to punch that guy in the neck. What I mean is, I want to take a bunch of tiny razors and glue’em to a glove, kind of around the knuckle area, and put on this glove and then punch …

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Sep 03 2009

Spinster aunt complains about Ted Kennedy

One of the reasons this spinster devotes fewer and fewer aunt-hours to reading blogs these days is the increasing likelihood that I will encounter something along the lines of “You call yourself a feminist? Shame on you for not writing about blahblahblah.” Whereupon the blogger in question writes sanctimoniously about blahblahblah. I fucking hate that …

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