Archive for the 'Crazy sexy cancer' Category

The vital mission of intimate apparel

As a spinster aunt whose monthly cancer drug bill could put a kid through Harvard, I always enjoy getting emails from people named Andrew at the National Boob Job Awareness Foundation who love my blog and are certain that my readers would equally love hearing about the Lap Dance For the Cure event or whatever. […]

Medical test results of the week

For those of you who follow my cancersploits and were wondering how my battery of scans from the other day turned out: a big old nugatory on all fronts.
I post this because I have noticed a marked tendency among the more melodramatically-inclined sector of the blametariat to speculate, in the absence of specific information to […]

Sneer of the week

It is possible to avoid going to shopping malls. If you’re imprisoned by Fundamentalist Mormons in the middle of West Texas.
The other day, for no very interesting reason, I was hot-footin’ it through one of these whirling vortices of polyester lust when I happened upon the above-pictured wretched display of consumerist bogosity. Simon Property Group, […]

Cancer sampler

I was mucking out the Twisty Archive of Abandoned Projects when I came across this funky and anomalous object. “Oh yeah,” I said. “That thing!”
It’s a self-portrait in cancerbroidery, incompleted a summer ago as I recuperated from, and felt compelled to represent in a medium with which I was entirely unfamiliar, assorted barbaric cancer cures. […]

Plucky gal parlays terminal illness into book, movie deal

Photo from TLC “The Life Lens” Documentary series.
It just shows to go ya, if you slap the word ’sexy’ on it, you can sell anything. Even “seemingly tragic” stage 4 cancer!
[Gracias, scrappyBadger]
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Breakfast of quadragenarians

Moonrise over the berry-flavored barium ’smoothie’.

UPDATE, JUNE 2: For those of you following my tiptoe through the garden of cancer, the scans were negative for metastases. One is tempted to hoist cups of wassail, but as it is only 10:30 in the morning, a shot of Patrón will suffice. A shout-out to the excellent Elsa, […]

I said who put all those things in your head

Susan Mitchell, writing in Salon on the oft-smirked-at phenomenon of ‘chemo-brain’, describes it nicely. Memory holes, addled wits, the “quite frequent inability to name common objects […] : ‘Book.’ ‘Envelope.’ ‘Cup.’”
And when I say she describes it nicely, I mean she is nice about it. She betrays little sense of outrage or crapulence when she […]

What the middle-aged nihilist is thinking this season

If you follow the news — and I pity you if you do — you have already heard that post-menopausal women can supposedly cut their risk of dementia in half if they take HRT (hormone replacement therapy) immediately after the onset of the pause. But the findings are merely “observational,” so don’t go running off […]

R.I.P: dignity, shelf bras

Ripped mercilessly from their tankinis, these former over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders are destined to hang limp forever more.
It’s like this: as of last July, I ain’t got no boobs. So today I initiate what is certain to become an annual ritual: the Spring Shelf-Bra Slice-Out. I expect to complain about it every year, too, so don’t be surprised […]

Sticker shock

The FDA just approved this drug for patients with mondo HER2-positive breast cancer. Lucky for Glaxo-Smith-Kline! And lucky for the 4 or 5 women on the planet who can fucking afford it! My insurance company doesn’t feel like coughing up. I’ll be on it for a year, assuming it doesn’t kill me, to the tune […]




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You are reading I Blame The Patriarchy, the patriarchy-blaming blog that advances the radical feminist views of Twisty Faster, a gentleman farmer and spinster aunt eating dinner in Austin, Texas.

I Blame The Patriarchy is intended for advanced patriarchy-blamers. It is not a feminist primer. See Patriarchy-Blaming the Twisty Way for details.

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