I do not have to be asked twice to plaster all over the internet photos of my new boyfriend Stanley. I snapped this one of us with my cell phone seconds before he stuck his nose out and lipped it out of my hand. Stanley is in many respects much more interesting than patriarchy-blaming, not […]
Archive for the 'El Rancho Deluxe' Category
My main man
Published February 12th, 2008 in Varmint Center, El Rancho Deluxe and Easy Persiflage. 27 CommentsThe cactuses at El Rancho Deluxe, I swear. Hours of compelling entertainment.
Prickly pears can also be made into a handy and garish pink syrup to enhance the spinster aunt’s Number 1 coping mechanism, the pitcher of margaritas.* As if their comedic talent weren’t enough!
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* Put on gloves. Pick a bunch of prickly pears. Throw a […]
I cannot resist one more spider post
Published July 6th, 2007 in Varmint Center and El Rancho Deluxe. 61 CommentsClump of harvestmen writhing in my perpetually unfinished soffit. The reader will kindly forgive the crappy picture quality; I had only my little point-and-shoot with me, having chemobrainedly omitted to throw the Big Camera Bag into the truck prior to departure. Phalangiium sp., Blanco County, TX, July 2007.
Speaking of shrimp foam, the Twisty Arthropod Institute […]
The love song of J. Twisty Faster
Published June 12th, 2007 in Announcements and El Rancho Deluxe. 80 CommentsCoryphantha sp. Blanco County, May 28, 2007
Been unavoidably detained. Not by cops. Completely forgot I had blog! Will likely stage triumphal return later today. Meanwhile, I leave you with (a) this super-trippy cactus flower, and (b) this thoughtful comment I found in the moderation pile (the commenter flatters me, in the first part, with […]
Sunday golden retriever/drought blogging
Published February 18th, 2007 in Varmint Center and El Rancho Deluxe. 13 CommentsSomething about this picture reminds me of the cover of “Abbey Road.”
Here are Bert and Zippy at El Rancho Deluxe, the Faster family country seat. Bert and Zippy are pictured enjoying their second-favorite activity, which is running like hell. Their first-favorite activity is sniffing crotches.
Bert has his hole-digging thing, of course, but that’s more of […]
Flora and Fauna of the Texas Hill Country, Bovine Edition
Published November 13th, 2006 in Varmint Center, El Rancho Deluxe and Austin. 12 CommentsLater on I’ll have a few remarks on the remarkable resilience of the myth of sexual repression, viz. the mean, scrunch-pantied city hall “nannies” who proposed — unsuccessfully, it turned out — to deprive Seattle’s furtive dicks of their right to lap dances, but first, a Texas longhorn heifer.
This is her mom.
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To Whomever Is Missing Two Cows Near Johnson City
Published June 6th, 2006 in Varmint Center and El Rancho Deluxe. 69 CommentsMystery Cow #1 (not pictured: Mystery Cow #2)
I have your cows, man.
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Blaming Takes A Quasi-Holiday
Published June 5th, 2006 in Varmint Center, El Rancho Deluxe and Easy Persiflage. 40 CommentsBert in future HQ
Frog
The quick-witted reader will have perceived that, recently, somewhat fewer posts than usual have oozed forth from my poison pen. One may be wondering what the heck. The heck is, it’s summer. Time for the spinster aunt to pry her hiney up off the lime green recliner and get with the aestival […]
Natural History, Part Two
Published April 9th, 2006 in Varmint Center, El Rancho Deluxe and Austin. 36 CommentsPipevine swallowtail larva, Blanco County TX, April 6, 2006
El Rancho Deluxe, the rural seat of the Fasters in Blanco County TX, in tres partes divisa est. There’s the hilly, woodsy part where the deer and the antelope play and where I’m building my new HQ, and there’s a big old flat pasture that should be […]
Twisty In TV Land, Chapter Two
Published March 16th, 2006 in Varmint Center, El Rancho Deluxe and Patriarchy-blaming. 94 CommentsBert performs forensic tests on an O. virginianus skull
Just as I once was amazed to discover that knitters make up half the audience of I Blame The Patriarchy, so was I recently shocked by the revelation that none of you readers owns a television, or that you do own a television but you never turn […]
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