Category Archive: The Entertainment Industrial Complex

Jan 26 2011

Death by femininity, again

If only pornography was just dirty pictures. That would still be bad, but not as bad as the real actual truth. Pornography — that is, the graphic representation of violence against women — is in fact like unto a thick, noxious gas percolating through every conceivable stratum of human culture. Take this example of multi-tiered …

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Dec 18 2010

A lil bit of twerking and lifting

bride

Patriarchy blamers are world renowned for their (professed) eschewment of cable television, so it is possible that you have not heard of the most misogynist TV show ever conceived. As an award-nominated professional bearer of bad news, I am here to correct this situation. The history of women’s degradation is long and colorful, but this …

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Oct 21 2010

Boy story

Advanced patriarchy blamers have already strapped into their handydyke utility belt of blaming techniques the Bechdel Test. But a little refresher can’t hurt, so check out the vid. The Bechdel test dates back to the 80′s and Alison Bechdel’s iconic comic Dykes to Watch Out For. The test aims the Blistering Beacon of Blame at …

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Oct 16 2010

Saturday invertebrate update

Wolf spider the size of Guam, covered with tiny wolf spiders the size of an island smaller than Guam. When a wolf spider the size of Guam strolls by, encrusted with, literally, a buttload of teensy wolf spiders, it is understandable if you widen the eyes a little and say something along the lines of …

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Aug 11 2010

Molting garden spider of the week

hairbattlespectacular

Phil, my secretary, has declined to ghost-write my essay today. He called in claiming writer’s block. What a load. He just wanted to lie around on the couch eating sour cream ‘n’ onion potato chips. I could hear Hair Battle Spectacular in the background when he called. What’s Hair Battle Spectacular? A TV hair-do competition …

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Aug 04 2010

Spinster aunt casts jaundiced eye at popular television show

Hollywood has long been recognized by the Global Cabal of Spinster Aunts as Ground Zero for American misogyny. Like everything that gurgles forth from that foul city, this Mad Men sensation that’s sweeping the nation has many sicko antifeminist repercussions. Never heard of Mad Men? It’s a “critically acclaimed” — which means that edgy dudes …

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Jul 02 2010

LA Times publishes article about woman; global reserves of sexist stereotypes dangerously depleted

In the news: a woman known as Anna Chapman is accused of being some sort of Russian spy (Russian spy? Seriously? I didn’t realize we still had those. It’s comforting to know that at least some beloved artifacts from my idyllic Cold War childhood endure). This LA Times story, the gist of which is gripping …

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May 23 2010

Profiles in Patriarchy: “The Slain Masseuse”

Good lard! TV! I ask you. They should exhibit TV right next to the Old Testament in the Great Moments in Patriarchy-Replication Technology Museum. I just watched half of a true-crime-umentary: “48 Hours | Mystery: Seven Days of Rage: The Craigslist Killer.” I would say that the subject of this true-crime-umentary was Craigslist killer Philip …

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May 21 2010

Profiles in Patriarchy: “The Girl”

No secrets will be revealed when I say that I watch television with depressing regularity, and that this habit chaps my hide a mile wide, but I can’t stop, because the carnage endlessly fascinates. Even the supposedly feminist shows (“30 Rock”) feature, not real feminism, but only bogus patriarchy-marketing TV feminism. Bogus patriarchy-marketing TV feminism …

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May 17 2010

“The Czech-born supermodel teamed her Dolce and Gabbana LBD with bondage heels.”

crotch_protectors

Images In Modern Patriarchy Quiz Match the following captions to the celebrity red carpet collages below (or suggest your own): Caption 1. “The world is my oyster.” Caption 2. “I am paid to be your fantasy but nevertheless I feel violated by your relentless, prurient gaze.” (Alternately: “Fine, take the boobs, but you’re not getting …

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