Category Archive: Heartwarming Nature Crap

Nov 26 2009

Update from the spinster compound

At Thanksgiving I usually let some steam whistle through my kettle of disgust regarding the holiday’s shameless celebration of domination culture, but this year I’ll confine myself to remarking that this ubiquitous euphemism “Turkey Day,” though it makes the spinster skin crawl, is at least a step in the right direction towards secularizing these godbag …

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Nov 14 2009

LubeWatch ’09

Unidentified terrestrial object, September 2009. Fellow heartwarming nature crappists will recall that, although spinster aunts are closely related to mushrooms (in terms of a shared propensity to sprout on rotting logs), my mycological chops are not, perhaps, as finely honed as might be considered ideal. Thus I will refrain from positively identifying this appealing, orange, …

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Nov 10 2009

Supercilious punctilio of the week

As has been well documented, I have exhibited gallantry and forbearance on this painful subject for years, but dammitjim I can be silent no longer! I Blame the Patriarchy is now officially a “teh menz”-free zone. By which I mean, the bizarre and cringe-u-lational phrase “teh menz” will no longer be admitted into blaming discourse. …

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Oct 31 2009

Heartwarming Nature Crap: Ants Baffle Aunt

The ones with the wings are breeders. Red harvester ants make crop circles that are, I kid you not, 6 or 8 or 1097 feet in diameter. They build’em right there in the middle of whatever lush little patch of prairie grass you happen to be strolling through, usually on the day you neglected to …

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Oct 26 2009

Spinster aunt laughed out of town

See this mondo fungal blob? Well, hold onto your hats, because it is the self-same mondo fungal blob a photo of which I posted a few days ago. Back then, it struck me as one of a genus of mushroom known to fungus geeks as Agaricus. It struck me thus because, I am ashamed to …

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Oct 19 2009

Spinster aunt discovers huge mushroom

Finally, a bulbous object worth talking about. Dig my ginormous whoppin Agaricus, baby.

Oct 05 2009

Danger and slapstick on Savage Death Island!

Fois gras on toast. Uchi, Austin TX, July 2007 In keeping with the recent commentary-on-a-comment motif into the self-referential depths of which this blog has recently plunged (if a blog may be said to have plunged into a motif, which contingency is, I admit, something of an uncertainty), today’s post is a blog comment upon …

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Sep 14 2009

Mutant prickly pear paddle de la semaine: Conehead

La tête Coneoise We are from France.

Sep 12 2009

Midnight horror movie baffles spinster aunt

That’s right, it’s the recent David Carradine in drag, cradling the future enfant terrible and leaving little to the imagination, junk-wise, in the film’s most tender scene.

For two days and two nights it has been raining — raining! — in Rattlesnake, TX. The Spinster HQ yella Lab puppy, Francine, is young enough that she has never seen rain before, on accounta the relentless drought which has been droughting since before she was born early this summer. Rain, however, has quickly ascended …

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Sep 08 2009

You thought I was just kidding

Announcing my new heartwarming nature crap series, “Mutant Prickly Pear Paddles of the Texas Hill Country.” I expect to turn the project into a coffee table book sometime in the future, perhaps when people can afford to buy coffee tables again. While I tootle off to Austin to buy some polyvinyl alcohol (the armadillos are …

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