Category Archive: Morsel Institute

Twisty’s gastronomic adventures

Feb 23 2007

Over 1,000,000 served

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Chile con queso con rajas at El Chile in East Austin. Departing somewhat from the standard Velveeta model, the queso at El Chile appears to contain, in part, queso. It was one of those momentous moments that, had anyone been conscious when it ensued, would not soon have been forgotten. I allude to the stately …

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Feb 22 2007

My sordid lunch

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I cannot explain the longing for smoked meat on a styrofoam plate that occasionally overtakes me. Rib plate with slaw and beans ($8.73) at Jim Bob’s, February 2007. West of Austin, on a scrubby stretch of Highway 71 that connects one zillion-dollar subdivision of McTuscan villas to the next, is the dilapidated, corndoggily cow-pokey, caliche-dust-covered …

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Feb 14 2007

Fruit report

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Stately, plump Twisty Faster came from the refrigerator, bearing a bowl of grapefruit upon which a spoon and her eyes lay crossed. The material specialties of Texas are abundant (and often vulgar), but few Lone Star commodities can compare with the Rio Star grapefruit. It is considered the finest grapefruit in the known universe. The …

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Feb 14 2007

Speculative fiction

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Stingray applies liquid sunbeams to a pork tenderloin taco at the indispensable TacoDeli, which taco stand is the principal force in a spinster aunt’s being. There are gaps in my intelligence on the recent Amanda Marcotte/Shakes Sis/psychotic godbag/American Political Machine episode. I am not in possession of all the facts. For instance, was there a …

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Feb 11 2007

Sunday blame-up: the week in woman-hating

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Chile con queso: one of the few gloppy pleasures left to me. There’s such a great, reeking snotglob of misogyny writhing and pulsating in my inbox right now I’m not sure I can contain it; it could blow any second. I first knew something was awry when, as I sauntered gaily into my office this …

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Feb 05 2007

New spamulator alert

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I baked this macaroni & cheese while not watching The Big Game. Afer complaints piled up about the mathulator and, more recently, about the secret passwordulator, I’m testing out a yet another question-response anti-spam plugin. It appeals to me because, in addition to foiling spambots, it is designed to ensure that the commenter has at …

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Feb 02 2007

The Sarah Silverman Program isn’t funny

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This post about TV is really just an excuse to publish a picture of cake. Coconut cake. The older I get, the lower the altitude at which are flying the fucks I give about pop culture. It’s true! I don’t listen to The Shins. I haven’t seen “Borat,” and have made no plans to do …

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Jan 30 2007

What I had for lunch

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Tuna on wheat: a fixed and unalterable point in the space-time continuum What other people are saying about their lunch: “At Bob’s urging, I just made my lunch for tomorrow.” — Willa “I had a Pizza McPuff at MCdonald’s but did not have any fun as I has to study after that!!! :((” — Prateek …

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Jan 11 2007

Public Cans of Austin: Blue Star Cafeteria

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It is a comfort to know that, in the event of a sudden torrent, the can designated for use at Blue Star Cafeteria by people who identify or are identified as women is equipped with a handy drain. Although it is a restaurant, the Blue Star Cafeteria isn’t a cafeteria. Naturally this is both distressing …

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Jan 09 2007

Blamer brain trust alert 2

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I wanted grouper, but the Fish Man stuck the fillet under my nose and said, “You don’t want this whiffy piece of crap. Have the halibut.” So I did, and glazed it with red wine, ginger, and Major Grey chutney. Blaming pedagogue M writes in with this request: “I’m trying to track down a good …

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